


But I Don't Belong (To You Anymore)

by MeteoraWrites



Category: Fear the Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Alpha Jake Otto, Alpha Madison Clark, Alpha Troy Otto, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, F/M, Family Bonding, Family Drama, Feels, Found Family, Getting Together, Happy Ending, Jeremiah Otto's A+ Parenting, M/M, Madison Clark's A+ Parenting, Madison has anger issues, Mpreg, Omega Alicia Clark, Omega Nick Clark, Past Child Abuse, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-08
Updated: 2019-05-08
Packaged: 2020-02-28 07:25:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 24,344
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18751762
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MeteoraWrites/pseuds/MeteoraWrites
Summary: Watching the bag of peppermint leaf’s tint the water slowly, he runs a hand through his hair and bites his lower lip. This is ridiculous. He can’t be pregnant. Nope. Not possible. Well, technically possible. But not probable. It’s probably some kind of bug.He manages to wait until half the cup of tea is drunk before his curiosity and anxiety gets better of him and he makes his way back into the bathroom to check the test.The little pink plus sign on the display makes him feel suddenly ill, more so than he had already.He ends up sitting on the cool tile floor, the positive test held between trembling fingers as the reality of his situation sinks in.He’s pregnant.He’s pregnant and Troy Otto is the father.





	1. Sick and Tired

**Author's Note:**

> I want to start by saying this is a rewrite of my abandoned fic Subtle Shift. After a LOT of talking in the trick discord group, I was encouraged to rewrite this for myself. I did love the original, but it wasn't how I wanted to write it and I stopped because the pressure someone else was putting on me to write it how they wanted made me hate the story so much I couldn't even scroll past it without being upset.
> 
> To that person,  
> If you're reading this, please don't comment. I did this for myself and my friends, not for you.

It starts one day when Nick is in line for breakfast. He’d woken up feeling a little off. Queasy. He thought nothing of it until he got a whiff of the sausage cooking nearby and suddenly his stomach gave a violent roll. He abandoned his tray in front of the coffee pots and just made it out behind one of the houses near the mess area before puking his mostly empty guts out. 

He gave up on food after that, opting for a cup of coffee and a few packets of tea to take back home with him for later. Karen, the sweet older Beta that was serving everyone breakfast that morning, gave him a sleeve of crackers to take with, in case his stomach eases up, which he takes with a grateful smile.  

He doesn’t miss the looks he gets as he leaves the mess area. He knows them well. He can smell the vomit clinging to himself. And the more acrid burnt notes of his scent are stronger than anything at the moment. Overpowering the citrus and petrichor that he usually smells of. 

He rolls his eyes and acts like it’s nothing. For the most part, it is. He can’t help how he smells. Well, he probably can. But he likes it now. Is fine with the way those few short years of drug use fucked up his scent glands and the rest of his biology. He always hated being an Omega. Always hated smelling sweet and going into heat and everything that came with both of those points. Now he smells more like a Beta. He likes that. 

The day he realized the heroine had fucked up his scent and turned the sugary sweet notes of his scent to something akin to burnt sugar, charred wood, and harsh chemicals, he was actually relieved. Then when he missed his next heat and found out the drugs had a negative effect on his reproductive system? Let’s just say he wasn’t heartbroken. He could still get someone else pregnant, so no big loss.  

Learning later on when he was older that he could indeed still get pregnant, but the odds were slim, was just kind of disappointing in all honesty. 

So yeah, his scent tended to offend at times. He could put on blockers or artificial scent to hide it. But why bother? Those closest to him were used to how he smelled now, and the others on the ranch weren’t ever around him long enough for it to be a real bother to them. It was a minor note to his scent more often than not anyway. Unless he’s feeling sick or generally miserable in some way, of course. 

The walk back to his cottage doesn’t take long; about ten minutes from the heart of the ranch. It’s out on the far edge of the fields, a small hill set between it and the rest of the ranch. It’s secluded in a way. Peaceful. Exactly what Nick wants. His own little half-built haven on the edge of the apocalypse. 

He imagines it would be finished by now if things had gone down differently on the ranch. But since his mom killed Jeremiah and the members of the nation moved onto the land with the rest of them it’s been too hectic to get much of the work he needs to be done. Not between militia duty and keeping Troy from going off the rails. 

Things are good for the most part these days. The tension between the people is at a minimal. And Troy is mostly back to how he was before his father’s death. Which is to say he’s still unpredictable at times, but he isn’t picking fights or running around on no sleep anymore. He’s mostly sticking to running the militia ragged and planning supply raids. 

Almost as if he knew he was being thought of, the man is sitting on Nick’s front porch as he approaches. 

The Alpha is in his ‘civvies’ as he calls them. A pair of tan cargo pants and a green button-up shirt. His journal resting on his knees as he scribbles away in it. He glances up when Nick draws near, a smile on his face that makes him look much younger than his 23 years. “Hey, Nicky... You feeling alright?” 

Nick snorts and shakes his head as he steps past the man and up onto his front porch. “Upset stomach. I’ll be fine. What’s up, Troy?” 

“Was gonna ask if you wanted to go on the days' supply run, buuuut you smell like puke, so I’ll bring Blake instead,” Troy says lightly as he presses his pencil into the center of his journal before closing it and tying the string around.  

“Gee, thanks,” Nick deadpans. His stomach is still rolling, but at the moment, talking to Troy, it isn’t so bad. 

“You want me to bring you some soup later? We aren’t going far. Just to the East edge of San Diego. Should be back by lunchtime.” The look Troy gives him as he offers is an earnest one. It makes a warm feeling settle in Nick’s chest despite how crappy he’s feeling right now. 

“Nah, man, I should be fine by then. I just puked, like, once. It was probably a fluke,” he waves off, smiling at the Alpha as he moves to stand and eyes Nick up and down like he’s unsure if he believes him. “Go on. I’ll see you later.” 

Giving him one last look over Troy nods and turns to walk away. “Just don’t go dyin’ on me, Clark. We have perimeter patrol together day after tomorrow and I expect your ass to be there. In your camo. No showing up in sweats.” 

“That was one time!” Nick calls after with a laugh. The unexpected visit lifting his spirit and helping to settle his stomach for the time being.  

~~~~~ 

Nick makes it all of an hour once Troy has left without puking his guts out. It’s horrible. And he’s honestly glad he’d rebuilt the damn bathroom before starting in on the kitchen or even the bedroom. Having a working toilet and shower is a fucking blessing. 

Once he’s certain his stomach is done rebelling, for the time being, he makes a cup of tea using the wood stove he’d dragged in and set up a few weeks back and then sips at it a while before crawling into bed to snooze the day way. 

~~~~~~ 

The next day is when he starts to think something might be up. He feels weird. He can’t quite describe it. He doesn’t feel like he has a stomach bug or the flu. He doesn’t feel hot or really gross all over like he would if he was sick. Just nauseated at the most annoying of times.  

He goes to the pantry that morning for more nails and some cans of soup and that’s when a thought occurs. One he hopes is just a ridiculous, throw away, a totally unlikely one. But still, it nags at him as he fills his cardboard box with supplies, and in the end, he wanders to the back of the pantry and snags a pregnancy test from the Woman’s and Omega’s supplies. 

He tucks it into the inner pocket of his jacket once he’s sure nobody has seen him grab it and then he grabs a bag of candied ginger to help with his stomach before taking his box of supplies and heading home. 

He doesn’t even bother going to breakfast, sure he’ll throw it up or just put others off their meal with the way he’s smelling right now. Alicia had brought him dinner last night and mentioned he smelled different. But she wouldn’t elaborate. Though the way she crinkled her nose led him to believe it was in a bad way. 

In any case, he’s got other things on his mind than food or even the sudden rolling of his stomach. 

One his house is in view he breaks into a run, not caring that it makes him want to puke up the water he drank after waking just an hour ago. He needs to get home.  

He makes it all the way to the porch before dropping his box of supplies and heaving. 

He manages not to get any vomit on himself, but the side of the box he carried doesn’t fare quite so well. Groaning, he picks it up, avoiding touching the splatter on the one side, and brings it into the house with him. It’s cardboard, he can just burn it. He needs to start a fire to make some tea anyway. 

The door opens into the living room kitchen combo that is also serving as his bedroom for the time being. It’s the only part of the little cottage style home that has a roof aside from the bathroom, and he’s fine with that for now. He had planned to spend the day working on the bedroom, but with the bouts of sickness, he’s been feeling that plan will have to go on the back burner. Needing to barf while climbing a ladder probably isn’t conducive to getting much work done. 

Now that he’s home, the little box in his pocket feels like a time bomb. A phantom ticking filling him with dread as he goes about slowly emptying the contents of the box of supplies. He knows it’s silly. He was told the odds of him ever getting pregnant were very small unless he actively tried. One night of sex hardly seems like trying. Mind blowing as the sex may have been. 

Once everything has been put away and the stove is lit with a kettle of water on for tea, Nick can’t procrastinate any longer. The little dollar store generic pregnancy test box is almost mocking him where he set it on his kitchen counter. Heaving a sigh, he grabs it and takes it into the bathroom, tearing it open almost violently before skimming over the instructions and  _ finally  _ just getting it over with. 

He leaves it on the edge of the sink, too anxious to trust himself to not fuck with it otherwise. The kettle starts to whistle then and he thanks the universe for the small distraction that offers as he walks out and pulls the kettle off the hot stove to make his tea. 

Watching the bag of peppermint leaf’s tint the water slowly, he runs a hand through his hair and bites his lower lip. This is ridiculous. He can’t be pregnant. Nope. Not possible. Well, technically possible. But not probable. It’s probably some kind of bug. 

He manages to wait until half the cup of tea is drunk before his curiosity and anxiety gets better of him and he makes his way back into the bathroom to check the test. 

The little pink plus sign on the display makes him feel suddenly ill, more so than he had already. 

He ends up sitting on the cool tile floor, the positive test held between trembling fingers as the reality of his situation sinks in. 

He’s pregnant. 

He’s pregnant and Troy Otto is the father. 


	2. Not Sure If I'm Strong Enough

Alicia finds him sitting on the porch a few hours later, a cup of tea in front of him that’s long gone cold and a box of crackers open that he hasn’t touched. He grabbed both on autopilot. Not sure what to do or how to feel right now. He doesn’t even register his sisters’ presence until she takes the seat opposite him at the little folding table he had found in the back storage of one of the barns. It’s old, splintered, a perfect match to the equally old wooden rocking chairs the Clark siblings now occupy. 

A sour note of worry is mixed in with the subtle honeysuckle and cinnamon scent that defines his younger sister, and it makes Nick’s stomach ache all the more. “Hey, what’s up?” he asks weakly, hoping she just came to see if he needed anything before going off to do whatever it is she does around the ranch. 

Alicia’s eyes narrow ever so slightly, studying Nick a moment before she clears her throat and speaks in a slow, careful tone. “Nick, tell me the truth. Are you using again?” 

The laugh that bubbles up out of Nick at those words is near-manic sounding and he instantly regrets it as the movement makes his nausea return strong as ever. “No,” he says with a shake of his head as a hand moves to rub at his aching stomach without thought. “No, trust me, I wish I was but I’m still clean and sober as the day we left on Strand’s boat.” 

The look Alicia gives him is less than trusting, her arms crossing in front of her chest as she leans back in her seat. “Alright, then tell me what’s going on with you. You’ve been sick for a few days and your scent is changing. And not like someone who’s got the flu or food poisoning. So, tell me what’s going on?” 

“What do I smell like?” Nick asks, deflecting. He wants to know. And a very small voice in the back of his mind is telling him this is his sister and it’s okay to tell her the truth. She’ll keep it a secret. Or he thinks she will. They were close once. Close as siblings could be. Best friends even. Until Nick got into high school and Calvin started dealing and convinced Nick to be his first customer. 

Looking a little thrown, like she honestly wasn’t expecting the question, she pauses a moment before tilting her head and breathing deeply through her nose. It’s normally considered rude to scent someone like this. But given that he asked and they’re family it’s not a big deal. “The burnt smell is changing. And you’re starting to smell sweet again. I can’t really tell what it is but you smell different than you did a few days ago.” 

“Fuck...” Nick utters before both hands come up to scrub at his face before pushing up into his hair, fingers tangling in the short cut scraggly brown locks. “Look, Licia, if I tell you what’s up with me you need to promise you won’t tell anyone, not even mom until I’m ready. Can you promise me that?” 

“It’s not drugs?” She asks one last time. 

“No,” Nick swears, shaking his head and letting his hands untangle from his hair to settle on his lap. 

Heaving a sigh, Alicia nods and uncrosses her arms, at last, relaxing into the chair as she speaks, “Alright, I promise.” 

Nick picks up his cold mint tea and takes a gulp for the soothing liquid before setting it down and turning the mug between his hands. “I’m pregnant,” he says softly, voice barely loud enough to be more than a whisper. 

There’s a pause, a long beat of silence that feels like an eternity before Nick looks up and sees that Alicia is studying him, looking for a lie or joke in his words. He swallows hard and when she realizes he’s serious he watches those green eyes grow wise as she sags down in her chair with an almost dazed expression. “Fuck. You’re serious? Like, actually, totally, serious? How?” 

Snorting Nick sags down in his own seat, mirroring her pose. “How do you think? I had sex, obviously,” he can’t help but snark. 

“Seriously though, I remember hearing mom say you couldn’t get pregnant because of what the drugs did to your body. How is this even possible, Nick?” The look of bewilderment on Alicia’s face clears and he can see the gears going to work in her mind. She wanted to become a doctor someday. She may have hated taking care of him, but he knows she also finds everything to do with the human body fascinating to some degree. 

“The constant drug use and malnutrition fucked up my system and made it so I no longer go into heat. What mom doesn’t remember is they never ran any fertility tests where I was a minor. I had the rehab docs run a test when I turned 18. They told me I can still get pregnant, but the odds were something like a 7% chance unless I was actively trying and, like, on special meds or something,” Nick rattles off, remembering most of what the doctors told him. He’d wanted to get the test just to confirm he was totally sterile in that aspect. He hadn’t expected the results he got. 

“Okay.... Wow. So, what are you going to do? You won’t be able to hide this for long, and mom is going to freak! Oh god, what about the other parent? Who is it?” Alicia says in a rush, sitting forward in her seat now with all of her focus on Nick as her brow creased in worry. 

“There isn’t much I can do, Alicia. I kind of doubt that the rednecks that run the clinic would be for giving an Omega an abortion. Especially not during the apocalypse. And I don’t even know what I want. I only found out I’m knocked up like 3 hours ago. I still can’t even wrap my mind around it,” Nick rambles, hands going back up to tangle in his hair again and pull a bit. The ache in his scalp helps ground him. He just feels so lost right now. He wishes his dad was here, he was always the one to console Nick when he was freaking out about his biology. He knows he’d know what to say now. 

Alicia’s hands on his shoulder pulled him from the storm of anxiety and confusion he feels, making him release the grip on his hair and look up to meet her gaze. “Hey, it’s okay, just breathe.” Her voice is gentle and she rubs her thumbs over the top curve of his shoulders as she speaks, something their dad used to do. 

“It’s Troy,” he utters after taking a few deep breaths. “Troy’s the other parent. We slept together the night the militia went and got you back from Walker’s people. So, I’m like, almost two months along, I guess. What am I gonna do, Licia?” 

She pulls him into a tight hug, Nicks' face pressed into her shoulder as she wraps both arms around and one hand goes to stroke his hair. “You’re going to try your best to calm down, then we’re going to have some tea and talk this out. I know you’re scared, Nick, but I’m here for you. Mom’s here for you. And I get the feeling that if you let him, Troy will be here for you too. You and your baby.” 

Nick finds himself melting into the comfort and familiar warmth his sister offers, taking several deep breaths through his nose to take in her scent as well to calm his fraying nerves. He knows he needs to calm down. Needs to think things through. He knows he needs to tell Troy. And he needs to tell his mom. But dear god he’s scared as hell of doing both. 

Troy’s been doing well these past few weeks. Slowly recovering from the death of his father and the betrayal he felt at being forced to share his land with Walker’s people. Nick’s been able to keep him from really going off the rails. But he’s still not totally okay, and the news that he got Nick pregnant could be the tipping point towards recovery or a breakdown. And Nick really doesn’t want to have to knock out Troy and see him set in that fucking hot box in the middle of a field again. 

“I have patrol with Troy tomorrow, and mom isn’t due back with Walker for a few days. I think...” he trails off, pulling away from Alicia and licking his slightly chapped lips before continuing. “I want to tell Troy first. Find out how he feels about everything before I tell mom. If he wants nothing to do with me and the baby after I tell him, then I’ll tell mom it was someone I met before Luciana and I got together.” 

Alicia nods along, letting Nick take his time to speak his thoughts. 

“Do you think... Do you think I’ll be a good dad?” Nick asks, gaze lowered so he can’t see his sisters face. 

“Nick, I’ve seen you with kids. I’ve seen the way you give them your full attention and make them feel like they’re the most important person in the world. I know you’ll be a good dad.” Alicia’s tone gives no room to argue.  

Nick can practically feel how strongly she believes this. The smile she wears when he looks up reminds him so much of their dad that it makes his heart ache to look at her. ”Now come one, let’s go make some tea and we’ll come up with a plan for how you’re going to tell Troy and mom.” 

Nodding, Nick slowly gets up and lets Alicia drag him inside. He feels like he might cry from how grateful he is to have her here right now. 

~~~~~~ 

That evening Nick finds himself back on his porch, yet another cup of tea in hand as he watches the sun start to set. He’s exhausted. So much so that he wonders if it’s worth getting up and going inside to climb into his bed. The rocking chair is actually pretty comfortable now that it has padding from two old pillows on it. 

The sound of gravel crunching under tires catches his attention and he turns his head to see Troy’s silver pickup slowly coming around the small hill and heading in his direction. He sighs, hoping it’s nothing important that brings the Alpha out here at this time of night. He’s too exhausted for militia duty right now. 

He offers a lazy wave from his seat, not bothering to get up even as Troy gets out of the vehicle and makes his way over. 

“Still sick?” Troy asks in lieu of greeting, making Nick roll his eyes. 

“You know, most people would say something like ‘hi’ first,” Nick grumbles before shifting in his chair and raising a hand to gesture for Troy to come take a seat in the one opposite his. “Yes, I’m still sick. Now, what brings you out here, Troy?” 

“Hadn’t seen you since yesterday morning, wanted to make sure you hadn’t died out here,” Troy teases, tone all mock concern even though there is a real tinge of anxiety to his scent right now. The notes that remind Nick of a bonfire in the early fall are still there, but a muskier heavy scent has masked the mild smell of daisies that you can only smell when close to the Alpha. 

“Not dead, just the absence of life,” Nick says with a sardonic chuckle. He has felt pretty drained from the morning sickness. The shock of finding out he’s pregnant did a number on him as well. He's so tired and miserable right now he must definitely look the part of the poor sick Omega. “I’ll be fine, Troy. Just might take me a while to feel better. Won’t stop me from doing my militia duty and getting this place finished.” 

Humming his understanding, Troy starts to rock in the creaky old chair, looking out over the open field to watch the sunset with Nick. “Good. If you were too sick to come out tomorrow I’d have to ask Blake or Coop. They’re not nearly as fun to have around as you are.” 

That makes Nick huff a real laugh. It’s a soft one, but he feels lighter from it. “Noted,” he says as he shifts around in his chair again, wanting to get a better look at Troy without totally turning to face him. “Hey, can I ask you something?” 

“Shoot.” Troy looks totally relaxed, content even. The smell of anxiety is slipping from his scent and the notes of wild daisies are growing with every relaxing moment they spend together. 

“How do you feel about kids?” He asks, knowing the question will throw the Alpha, which it does. Troy’s face scrunches in confusion and he gives Nick a clearly questioning look. “Alicia was talking about letting Jake help her through her next heat. It got me thinking,” he lies with a shrug, tone innocent. 

The look of confusion is replaced with one of surprise and Troy sinks back into the rocking chair with a contemplative look on his face. “I mean, I like kids. They’re alright. Haven’t had much interaction with them since I was one, but I think I could handle being an uncle now. Sounds kinda fun, actually...”  

The look on Troy’s face is almost dreamlike as he appears to be picturing his brother and Nick’s sister with a baby. It makes something stir inside of Nick that he can’t quite place. “You ever think about having kids?” 

Snorting, Troy turns to him with an almost goofy grin. “Course I have. I always wanted my own family...” 

Nick wants to reach out and take Troy’s hand at the way his grin shifts to something more somber. He’d opened up about what Big Otto put him through growing up. What his mom put him through. He gets the fear behind that. He’s got similar fears given how Madison could be with him at times. 

“Anyway, I always figured I’d either wait ‘til Big Otto passed and left me the ranch, or I moved out to start one of my own before I’d have a family. My dad, he wanted me to find a wife like my mom. Or like he’d hoped she would be, anyway. Someone that’d do what I want without question. I didn’t want that. I saw the kind of girls Jake would date. They challenged him. Made him thank and actually work for their time, just like they did for his. I always wanted a relationship like that with whoever I have kids with.” Troy rambles, eyes going back to the fading oranges of the horizon as he avoids looking at Nick. 

“I get that,” Nick says softly. He knows Troy is attracted to him. Wants to be with him. He’s made it clear time and time again. But he’s respected Nick’s wishes and stayed away after their one night together. It was just a night of fun and they’re just friends. But now... Now he thinks it’s okay to want more. Especially given what they’ve created together. 

“You ever,” Troy starts before licking his lips and turning to face Nick,” think about that night we spent together?” 

It’s hard for Nick not to smile at the question. “Yeah, I do. A lot actually. And I’d actually like to talk to you about it, but I’m beat, man. Can we talk about it after patrol tomorrow?” Almost as if to prove a point, a loud yawn escapes him, making his heavy body feel even heavier with the desire to sleep. 

Blinking in surprise, Troy nods and moves to stand. “Sure thing. I’ll see you tomorrow.” 

“Yeah, see you tomorrow. G’night, Troy,” Nick calls after as Troy walks around and off the steps, heading for his Trick. 

“Night, Nicky,” the Alpha calls back, clearly pleased. 

Nick watches him drive away and spends another 10 minutes in the dwindling twilight thinking about his situation. After talking to Troy, he thinks he knows what he wants to do. He just hopes it’s the right decision. 


	3. Quite Certain (The Devil Lives In Heaven)

The next morning finds Nick waking up to Alicia walking into his home at the crack of dawn with a box of supplies for him.  

He really needs to put a lock on that damn door. 

Begrudgingly, he gets up and joins her for a light breakfast of toast and eggs while she goes over what she’s brought him besides a warm meal. 

There are a few books on pregnancy for male Omegas that she found in the back of the pantry, as well as a bottle of prenatal vitamins and another bag of candied ginger. She even got him packets of ginger tea and crackers. 

“Troy came by last night,” he mentions after he’s finished most of his breakfast. The ginger tea is helping keep his morning sickness at bay, but he’s still eating only small bites in an attempt to keep them down. “We talked. I didn’t tell him. But I found out he likes kids and does want a family...” 

The smile Alicia gives him from behind her coffee cup is hopeful. “That’s great, Nick.” 

“We’re going to have the real talk after our shift on patrol is over. I thought I’d bring him back here, sit him down and just tell him everything. Get it all out in the open and ask him what he wants,” Nick explains as he pokes at a piece of scrambled egg with his fork lazily. “I have some idea of what he wants. And I think I want the same thing... But if this isn’t what he wants I’ll tell him no hard feelings and leave it at that.” 

“If, and I’m hedging on it being a small if, he doesn’t want this I will personally kick his ass. But I’ll also be here for you every step of the way. I promise.” The warmth and sincerity Nick feels from his sisters' words are enough to make him choke up a little. 

He hides it by clearing his throat and turning his head to look out the window at the still rising sun. “Thank you.” 

~~~~~ 

An hour later finds Nick walking out of his front door in full camo to meet Troy, who is waiting outside his door with the truck running and a grin on his face. 

“Morning, Nicky. How are you feelin’?” he asks, all sweet and charming as he leans against the side of the Truck with his arms crossed over his chest. 

Nick wants to laugh at the display. Troy’s trying to look impressive today. Hair combed, beard trimmed and camo freshly laundered. He appreciates the effort in all honesty. If someone he’d been into said they wanted to talk about said interest he’d probably do the same thing. 

“Morning, Troy,” Nick replies with a small smile as he makes his way over to the truck. ”I’m feeling alright. Just go easy on the hills? I really don’t feel like upchucking in your truck.” 

Troy’s nose crinkles at the thought of that and he shakes his head before finally moving to get in the truck, Nick not far behind. “Yeah, I’m not too keen on that myself.” 

Once they’re in the truck Troy’s got them on the move, headed for the main gate of the ranch. It’s not a long drive, but Troy goes slow for once in his life and Nick is honestly grateful for it as normally Troy drives like a maniac and has Nick bouncing in his seat constantly. He hasn’t even put on his signature screeching metal music that Nick has started to develop an appreciation for. Not that he’s going to tell Troy that. It’s too much fun to give him shit for his tastes. 

Once they’re outside the fence Troy makes a b-line for the well-traveled dirt road that circles the entire perimeter of the ranch. They'll do three circles around, then go off road and do a few winding circles that stretch out farther and farther over the next few hours. Searching for the dead or any signs of the living stumbling in the direction of their home. 

They’re quiet for the first couple miles of driving. It’s still early. Peaceful out. 

Nick pulls a piece of ginger candy from his pocket and starts to chew on it as he rolls his window down and lets the morning air enter the cab and fill his senses. It’s nice. Yeah, he’s got a job to do. But he also gets to spend this time with Troy. No one else in the militia. No reason for either of them to act like they’re just friends. Because he thinks they’re not at this point. And he’s hoping his plan for later goes the way he thinks it will. 

“You almost smell content over there,” Troy notes after a while more of driving in relative silence. 

“Yeah?” Nick asks with a slight chuckle. “The longer I’m clean the better my scent glands work. I’ll never smell entirely like I should though,” Nick notes, sniffing the air lightly to try and get a hint of his own scent over the spicy smell of ginger coming from the candy he’s still gnawing on.  

“I like the way you smell,” Troy says almost too quiet for Nick to hear. 

He does hear though, and it makes him feel a bit warm in his chest. Happy even. “Even when I’m sick?” Nick can’t help but joke. 

“You don’t really smell sick, just different. It’s not bad. You only smell sick if you’ve been puking your guts out,” Troy explains after a short pause. Like he was thinking about how he wanted to word things. 

“Like I said, the longer I’m clean the more my scent changes. Remember when your men had me locked up at the depot? They had to ask what I was because all they could smell from me were burnt chemicals and fear coming off me,” Nick deflects. He knows what his scent is shifting towards. He just hopes that for now Troy and the others on the ranch will assume it’s just shifting towards that of a normal Omega. 

To Troy’s credit, he actually looks regretful and ashamed at the mention of the depot. Long patrol shifts spent talking with Nick about what he was doing and why starting to get him to understand how other humans think and feel and that what he did was pretty fucking out there. Scientific curiosity or not. 

The sour notes twisting through Troy’s otherwise pleasant scent make Nick’s stomach roll despite the calming effect it had been having thus far, and he leans so his head is angled to get a breath of fresh air from the open window. 

“I burned them, you know,” Troy says after a beat of silence. “My notes from the depot. I ripped ‘em out of my journal and burned them a few nights ago. Kept thinkin’ about what you said. That I’m not a scientist. I know I’m not... and that I hurt people but I can be better if I really try... I want that. I wanna be better, Nick.” 

The confession leaves Nick stunned momentarily. Unsure of how to respond. He knew he’d been making progress with Troy. Playing his conscience in a way until Troy started to really develop one of his own. But he wasn’t expecting something like this. Troy and those notes have been inseparable from day one. Even when he was sleep deprived and half out of his mind. You couldn’t take them from him if you tried. 

“That’s... Wow, Troy...” is all he manages as he sinks down into his seat a bit and just looks at the other man. Really looks at him. Maybe this can work? Maybe he can make this work. 

The smile Troy flashes him is beaming. Bright in a way Troy doesn’t usually show anyone but his brother when he thinks no one is looking. It gets Nick smiling back just as bright.  

After that, they fall into idle chit-chat about what Nick has been missing around the ranch while he’s been ‘sick’. It’s nice. Uneventful. Exactly what Nick needs to ease the tension he’s felt about the decision to talk to Troy after patrol that night. 

~~~~~ 

When they re-enter the gates of the ranch it becomes obvious something big is going down. There’s a massive truck waiting by the well and everyone's gathering around it. 

They drive up to the edge of the crowd, Troy killing the engine and hopping out before Nick even has his seatbelt off. 

Walker is standing beside the truck with Jake at his side as they fill jugs and buckets and barrels with water. The wells were getting low. The reservoir is close to dry.  

Walker and Jake are talking as Troy and Nick push their way through the clamoring crowd towards them. Apparently, Madison and Walker came across Strand at a place called El Bazar. And more importantly, he brought them to a Dam being run by Daniel and a group of people who worked there before the end of the world. They made an agreement. Bring Ofelia to meet up with her father and they can have all the water they need. 

Ofelia agreed to go already, and the people are talking about celebrating. 

Troy pulls Nick close enough to be heard and tells him he needs to talk to Jake, but he’ll be over to Nick’s place shortly so they can talk. 

Nick agrees to see him later and heads off in the direction of his home on the far side of the ranch. The excitement is making him feel sick, no surprise there, and he wants to get out of there before he pukes and ruins the mood. 

For the briefest moment, he wonders what his mom is up to. She wasn’t in the group at the truck. But then again neither was Alicia, so they’re probably off somewhere together. 

Or not. When he gets close to home he sees Madison sitting on his front steps. She’s got a beer in hand and looks exhausted as she watches him approach. 

“Hey, mom!” Nick calls even as he reaches into his pocket to fish a piece of candy out of the little baggie he brought with him. He pops it into his mouth and hopes she’s too tired to stick around long. “I saw the water truck. Looks like you and Walker had a good scouting trip.” 

Madison takes a long pull from her half-empty beer before setting it aside and smiling at her son. “Yeah it went alright,” she says, tone tired but happy. “I heard you’ve been sick the last couple days. Surprised you were out on patrol instead of resting.” 

Snorting, Nick steps past her and up onto the porch to open his front door. “It’s just a stomach bug, mom. Sides, the fresh air did me some good. I only threw up once the whole time I was gone.” It’s the truth. Small victories. He’s pretty sure it was the combination of Troy’s scent and the ginger candy that helped keep the morning sickness at bay in the end. 

“Yeah? That’s good. You want me to make you some soup? I know you haven’t had dinner yet.” Madison offers, coming to stand behind Nick and follow him inside. 

“Nah, I’m gonna go to dinner in a while. They’re talking about having a big cookout to celebrate the deal with the dam,” Nick brushes off. He doesn’t want her to know Troy is coming over. She’s barely accepted their budding friendship. It took an argument after she killed Jeremiah and he had to talk Troy out of fighting Walkers men for her to accept that the two of them were becoming friends despite everything that’s happened and she needs to get over her opinion of the other Alpha. 

“You sure? I know how sensitive your stomach is when your sick and there are too many scents in the air...” she trails off, confusion etched on her face as she looks past Nick to the box of things on the half-finished kitchen counter on the far right side of the room. 

It takes a moment for Nick to realize what she’s seeing. The books are out of sight but the bottle of vitamins are in plain view. Label clear as day. He feels his blood run cold as he turns back to see anger filling her eyes. 

“Nick, who’s prenatal vitamins are those?” She asks slow and deliberate. She’s got that kind of calm tension to her that makes Nick want to flinch and hide. He can practically hear her fists clenching. 

“No ones. They ended up in my supplies by mistake. I was gonna take them back this morning and forgot,” he tries to lie. 

“Don’t!” Madison shouts, temper flaring and the scent of angry Alpha filling the air. It makes Nick’s stomach roll in protest, and he takes a step back on instinct. “Don’t lie to me, Nick. Who’s are they? Luciana’s? I know they aren’t Alicia’s, I just left her and she didn’t smell pregnant.” 

“What? No! Mom, I swear, they just ended up in my supplies by mistake! I would never have let Luci go if she was pregnant, you have to believe me!” Nick defends, taking another step back and bumping into the counter. 

Madison steps closer so quickly it makes Nick actually cower, and when her hand raises he closes his eyes tight, arms wrapping around his stomach protectively instead of going to cover his face like he normally would. There’s a long pause, and when no flurry of slaps come raining down on him he cracks an eye open to find Madison frozen on the spot. 

Her eyes are wide, hand slowly lowering as she takes a deep breath through her nose. 

That’s when it hits him. And he sinks to the floor in horror. “No... No, no, no, no, no...”  

The air smells sweet, something akin to a lemon tart along with the petrichor and charred wood notes that always cling to him. The chemical notes are weaker than ever. And there’s more too his scent now, something he can’t name but knows is the smell of a pregnant Omega. 

“Nick...” Madison’s voice is soft as she looks down at her son. A beat later she’s down on the floor with him, the hand that was ready to strike him a moment before gently taking hold of one of his own and pulling it away from where it had wrapped around his middle. ”Honey, how is this possible?” 

“I... I slept with someone before I got with Luci...” he utters after the shock starts to wane.  

The look on Madison’s face is that of confusion. Disbelief. Then anger again. “That was over three months ago. Don’t lie to me, Nick. Please. You can’t be more than two months along. Not from the way you smell. You would have started having morning sickness weeks ago if that were the case.”  

Before Nick can protest further Madison has ripped her hand from her sons and is up and pacing the room. The smell of her irritation is starting to overtake the burst of his own scent and it makes him feel sick all over again. 

“It’s someone on the ranch, isn’t it? One of the militia members that you’re always off drinking with after patrol?” It’s an accusation more than a question. 

Before Nick can even open his mouth to try and argue she’s out the door. It takes him a moment to realizes, and he forces himself to get up and start running. 

Madison has the advantage. Enhanced muscle tone of an Alpha letting her sprint faster and get a good head start on him. He's always been thanks to his lithe build, but nausea has him staggering to a halt and puking up the few pieces of ginger candy and the crackers he ate for lunch that day. 

By the time he’s able to force himself up and running again Madison has already made it to the congregation around the water truck. And worst of all the entire militia is there. 

He makes it to the edge of the crowd just in time to hear his mother’s voice boom over the chatter. 

“Which one of you knot-heads knocked up my kid!”


	4. You Don't Know (What I've Done)

The crowd falls silent as Madison forces her way to the open space in the center where Troy, Jake, and Walker had been talking about the success of their agreement with the Dam.  

“Madison, what are you talking about? Alicia isn’t pregnant.” Jack’s voice gives away how utterly confused he clearly is by Madison’s outburst. He’s stepped forward, eyeing the older Alpha like she’s grown a second head. 

Madison’s temper flares further in response. “Not Alicia. Nick! I want to know who got my son pregnant.” 

A flurry of whispers starts up at that, and no one notices Nick pushing his way through the crowd until he’s out in the open not even ten feet from his mother. “Mom! What the hell do you think you’re doing!” he shouts, clearly horrified by her outburst. 

“Getting the truth! I want to know who the father of my grandchild is!” She shouts back, the smell of pissed off Alpha coming off her in waves. 

It makes his own hormones kick into high gear, the smell of scared, pregnant Omega also growing strong in the air around them. “I’m the father! For fuck's sake, mom! I’m male! Just because I’m pregnant doesn’t change that. I thought you of all people would understand!” 

Madison scoffs and crosses her arms over her chest, glaring at her son. “Fine, I want to know who the other parent is? I deserve to know and you keep lying to me,” she says in a cold tone. Nick knows it well. She’s used it on him many times, but never in front of anyone before.  

It makes him want to cower and protect himself, but he resists. Instead, he squares his shoulders and does his best to keep himself from looking as horrified as he feels. “They didn’t even know yet! I didn’t have the chance to tell them. And now because of your bullshit need to control my life everyone on the ranch knows! So, no, I’m not telling you and neither are they! And if you try anything like this ever again I’m leaving the ranch and you behind!” 

“You wouldn’t dare!” Madison shouts as she takes a step closer. Jake moving out in a flash to throw an arm between the two of them and keep her from getting too close. He knows it’s suicide to touch her right now, but he’s more loyal to Nick for his help with Troy these past months than he is to Madison for her help governing the ranch.  

“I would. I’ve left before. You know what I’m capable of, so don’t test me!” Nick lets his tone drop, threat clear and strong despite the feeling of fear and nausea that’s got him shaking where he stands. 

“You wouldn’t risk the baby! Even you can’t be that stupid!” Madison argues, pushing forward only to have Jake and three members of the militia come forward to block her further. It’s Cooper, Blake, and Jimmie. The three people Nick has honestly become friends with other than Troy. They form a line between behind Jake to block Madison from getting closer to Nick.

“If it means getting away from you and your need to control every aspect of my life, then I’ll risk anything! I’m an adult. Have been for a few years if you haven’t noticed. I get to decide how my life is lived and who is in it. Now back the hell off!” Nick shouts right back, leaving his mother stunned. He allows himself to glare at her a beat longer before turning just enough to look at Jake, and beyond him to a clearly shocked Troy, who still stands beside Walker. “I’m sorry about this, really.” 

With that, he turns and storms off through the madding crowd. He knows his friends will keep Madison from following, and he hopes that Troy knows that apology was aimed at him. 

He makes it back home in record time. Even gets into his bathroom before the morning sickness and stress gets to him and he has to puke again. It’s all bile at this point that burns his throat. and he finds himself curled up on the floor after, gasping in ragged breaths as he protectively wraps his arms around his stomach once again. 

Troy knows.  

The whole entire fucking ranch knows. 

So much for his plans. 

Maybe he has enough time to pack and steal a truck before his mom can come after him again. Jake and the others will keep her away for a little while at least. Right? Cooper, Blake, and Jimmie will keep watch and stop her if she tries to sneak off to go after him?

His musings are cut short by a knock echoing through the open bathroom door. Someone is honest to god knocking on his front door after that? 

Groaning, he forces himself up and out into the living room as another knock sounds. 

“Alright, alright! Hold your horses!” He shouts even as he opens the door wide, expecting it to be his mother if anyone. 

Troy stands on the other side. One hand still raised to knock and the other braced against the frame to keep him standing. He looks a bit pale. Which is impressive given how tan he is. He also appears to be out of breath and unable to speak when he sees Nick. 

“That was what you wanted to talk to me about, wasn’t it?” He says after a moment of stunned silence. 

All Nick can bring himself to do is nod. The words are already out there, but he can’t bring himself to speak them all of the sudden. Not like this. 

So, he reaches out and grabs Troy by the arms and pulls him inside. The Alpha goes along willingly, even as Nick spins him out of the way then slams the door shut in a rush. Once that’s taken care of both hands fly up to tangle long fingers in his own hair as he tries to take a deep, calming breath. 

To Troy’s credit, he doesn’t push. Doesn’t speak or do anything really. Just stands quietly with a look akin to that of a deer in headlights and waits for Nick to compose himself. 

“I’m sorry,” is the first thing he’s able to say when his voice finds him again, weak as it may be. “I’m sorry you found out like that. I wanted to tell you first. I wanted to tell you and give you the choice. If this wasn’t what you wanted I was going to tell my mom it was someone from Luciana’s community. She surprised me and then she realized I was pregnant and-” 

“How did she find out?” Troy cuts in. His voice is soft. The opposite of what Nick was expecting. 

“What? What’s it matter, Troy?”  

“I was with you all day and couldn’t tell. We weren’t even apart half an hour and now you smell like pregnant Omega and fear. The whole room reeks of fear and anger.” The look Troy is giving him makes Nicks’ heart clench in his chest. “Tell me the truth, Nick. Please? After everything we’ve shared these past weeks, don’t lie to me right now.” 

Swallowing hard, Nick nods before turning to go and take a seat on the edge of his bed. He doesn’t think he can stand much longer, and he’s not sure he wants to be. So, he signals for Troy to come sit beside him. 

Instead, the Alpha kneels at his feet. It’s a gesture so against the dynamic of their natures that Nick’s taken aback for a moment. 

Troy just looks up so he can keep his blue eyes lock with Nicks’ dark brown ones. There’s trust there. And something else Nick can’t name but knows is more than he ever expected to see in those eyes. 

“She saw the bottle of prenatal vitamins I got this morning and freaked out. She thought they belonged to Luciana and when I tried to argue that I would never have let her go off alone if she was pregnant she raised her hand to hit me. I don’t really know how it happened. I was scared she would hurt the baby and the next thing I knew my hormones were pumping out that pregnant Omega smell...” he trails off. It feels so insane to say aloud. 

Anger flashes across Troy’s face when Nick tells him that Madison was going to hurt him, but that melts away when Nick actually says the word ’baby’ for the first time. It’s like a switch is flipped and he settles again like that word is magic. 

“So you’re really...”  

“Pregnant? Yeah...” Nick feels a sad smile tug at his lips at the way Troy’s eyes grow impossibly wide. “Yeah, I’m pregnant. And you’re the other parent if that fact wasn’t obvious from my inviting you over to talk tonight and the night of mind-blowing sex we had that coincides perfectly with the timing of this little miracle.” 

For a long moment, he thinks Troy’s going to bolt, but then he smiles. One of those real smiles. Not a smirk. Not a half smile. But a full-on grin. 

“We’re having a baby?” He asks like he can’t believe It's true. The smell of happy Alpha fills the air around them and it, in turn, eases the fear clinging to Nick and starts to draw out the smell of happy Omega. 

“We’re having a baby. If that’s what you want. I know I said before that what we had was a once in a lifetime offer... But I’ve been thinking, since before I knew I was pregnant. And if you still want to I-” 

A pair of familiar lips press against his as warm hands gently cup his cheeks. Troy kisses him so sweetly that Nick feels himself melt into it like sugar melting in warm tea. It’s gentle and reassuring and exactly what Nick needs at this moment. 

When their lips part Troy doesn’t pull away, instead pulling Nick forward so his forehead rests against Troy’s as their breath mingles between them. “Nick, I swear I want you more than I’ve ever wanted anything in my life. And I want this baby. Our baby. I’ll spend every day proving it to you if it means I get to have you both.” 

Nick brings his own hands up then, one cupping the side of Troy’s neck while the other tangles in his hair. “Good, because I want you too. And our baby.” 

He can hear the smile in Troy’s voice as he lets his hands slip from Nick’s face to wrap around his waist and pull him into a hug. “Now what? Madison is gonna lose her shit all over again when she finds out this baby is mine.” 

Huffing a laugh, Nick lets himself give in to instinct and he starts to rub his cheek against Troy’s neck just below the curve of his jaw. Scent marking him. “Well, the way I see it we have two options. We stay here and wait for her to come storming back. Or we can go to your place and hide out while we figure things out. You don’t have militia duty for the next two days, right?” 

“Blake’s in charge, yeah. I’m supposed to be driving out to check on a few outposts we don’t use anymore. But I can put that off until next week,” Troy offers, voice dropping close to a damn purr as he starts to rub his own cheek against Nick’s throat, returning the scent marking.  

A long moment later Nick pulls away, much to both of their disappointment. “Let’s get out of here. I don’t imagine even the militia can keep my mom contained for very long when she’s pissed.” 

Troy nods and stands before pulling Nick to his feet. 

They pack a few clothes into the old backpack Nick has stashed under his bed as well as some of the vitamins, tea and the books Alicia gave him that morning. It won’t look like he’s bugged out. Madison knows he wouldn’t leave without the gun Jeremiah gave him. And that’s on the wall above the door at the moment. He hopes that’s enough to convince her he’s just out for a walk if she comes looking. 

With one last look around Nick closes the door, takes the hand Troy offers, and they set out across the field that goes the long way around the hill. No one will see them approaching the Otto homestead this way, and most importantly no one will look for him there. 

It’s exactly what he needs right now. Two days of peace and quiet while he and Troy figure things out. Two days to figure out how to make this work. To start building towards becoming a family.


	5. When I Was Young

The first night of their time hidden away Jake shows up at the house looking to talk to Troy about the drama that had happened earlier that evening. He finds Nick curled up on the living room couch, Troy sitting on the floor in front of him. Talking about possibilities for the future. 

To say Jake is surprised that Troy is the other parent of Nick’s child is an understatement, but after the moment of initial shock has passed he pulled Troy into a tight hug and told him he was there for the three of them.  

That led to Jake going to get Alicia and bringing her to the Otto homestead to hatch a plan to run interference with Madison for the next two days. She was likely to try and track Nick down, whom she believes is at his own home right now, and demand to know the identity of the other parent yet again. Alicia is to convince Madison that he hasn’t run away if she discovers his house empty. She’ll tell her that he’s out for a walk or on militia duty, or something believable for the timeframe.

They even agree to get some trusted members of the militia to help if need be before leaving for the night. 

That brings them to where they are now. 

Nick once again laying on the couch, Troy on the floor like he’s trying to make a point that he wants to be close to Nick but is willing to respect whatever Nick wishes. Which at the moment is for them to ease into this. Because honestly, he’s scared. He has a tiny human growing inside him. That is fucking terrifying. And even more so is the fact that the person that helped create that tiny human is someone who only a few months ago tried to kill him... Yeah, he legit doesn’t get how he got here from there. 

He’s 99% sure this isn’t some kind of Stockholm syndrome, given that he’s actually spent a fair amount of time away from Troy since coming to the ranch. But regardless, he still wants them to take the time to talk things out and learn how they work as more than just friends who fucked once and made a baby. 

He and Luciana didn’t talk. Not really. They just jumped headlong into being together and that blew up in his face in the end. Because when he finally tried to talk she left. 

So, yes, he’s scared. He’s scared and he wants to do this right. For himself, and for the little soon-to-be-human that’s currently giving him morning sickness. And by the way, morning sickness is the biggest damn lie. It’s not just in the morning. It’s off and on all day and its total bullshit. He’d kill to be able to eat a full meal without being sick. 

“I don’t want to live here...” Troy begins after a long silence. He’s been leaning against the edge of the couch with his head resting on Nick’s stomach. He thinks he can hear the tiny flutter of a heartbeat. Nick thinks it’s just his stomach gurgling, but didn’t voice that opinion. 

“You don’t?” Nick asks, a little surprised. It’s a nice house, all things considered. But he supposes he gets it, given what Troy’s childhood was like. 

Troy shakes his head, inadvertently nuzzling into Nick’s stomach at the same time and making the younger man squirm a little. “I’d like to move in with you eventually. Help you finish rebuilding the old place.” 

Nick hums his understanding as he brings a hand up to run his fingers through Troy’s hair. “I think I’d like that.” 

They fall into another comfortable silence after that, Nick humming a little to himself until Troy speaks again. 

“There’s talk of building walls,” Troy mumbles after his eyes have slipped closed from the feeling of Nick playing with his hair. “Not big ones. But enough that the dead can’t just waltz in.” He leaves off the comment of ‘like they almost did’. He doesn’t need to. Everyone on the ranch is still eating crow for not believing Troy when he said he saw a herd coming. 

“You think it’ll work?” Nick asks as he lets his nails drag against Troy’s scalp lightly. He’d like to think it will, but he’s not sure how they would even go about building walls around such a large area. Unless they don’t plan to build around the fields. That could probably work. Just building around the area that houses the barns and homes... Though that would leave his own home outside the safety any walls would provide. 

“Jake says he wants me and Walker to get together in a few days to start drawing up plans and work out where the scouts and militia can go to gather supplies. We need to find something to build with before we can settle on a plan,” Troy explains with a tired sigh as blue eyes blink open to look up at brown ones. 

“But do you think it’ll work?” Nick asks again, not sure why Troy didn’t give him a straight answer. 

“I think it could work, depending on how we go about it. We can’t just build some fence like you would to keep a rabid dog out of your yard. Whatever we build, its gotta be able to hold up to a herd pressing in on it. I got an idea, but I don’t think Jake’ll go for it...” he trails off, eyes drifting closed again. 

“So, tell me? Maybe we can work on it together?” Nick offers, hand stilling and leaving Troy’s hair, earning him a slight pout in return. 

“Shipping containers,” Troy says simply as he picks up his head and shrugs his shoulders. “There are hundreds of them just sitting all along the waterfront in San Diego. We empty ‘em out and line ‘em up around the whole ranch. We can even surround the fields if we do it right.” 

Nick shifts on the couch and pushes himself up to sit with his back against the armrest, still facing Troy. “That’s actually a really good idea... Dude, that could actually work. You already have the trucks on hand that can haul them, and the shipyards have the machinery you need to load and unload them. You seriously need to pitch that idea to Jake, it’s perfect.” 

“You think so?” The smell of happy Alpha starts to grow stronger, and the corner of Troy’s mouth twitches into a small smile. 

“I know so. You can weld them together and use scrap metal to reinforce them.” Nick can’t help but smile back at the way Troy is looking at him now. A sparkle in those blue eyes that gives away just how much he appreciates Nick’s opinion. 

Troy reaches up, a hand gently cupping Nick’s cheek and pulling him forward just enough to meet Troy where he leans to kiss him. Yet again it’s a bit softer than Nick expects, not that he has a problem with that. Troy knows he won’t break, but he’s also trying to give Nick the choice to back away here if he wants. 

Nick returns the kiss a bit more forcefully with a hum of approval. When he pulls back the warmth in Troy’s gaze is almost overwhelming. He chooses to believe the sudden urge to kiss him again and tackle him to the floor while doing so is just from the pregnancy hormones. He refuses to be that easy to win over. At least for now... 

“We should play a game. Something to get us learning more about each other?” Nick pitches after he settles back down on the couch once more. It’s old and surprisingly comfortable. 

“Like what?” Troy asks, suddenly giving Nick a wary look. 

Shrugging, Nick looks around the room idly as he tries to come up with something. “I don’t know. Like... You ask me a question and I have to answer honestly, then I ask you one?” It’s easy enough, and it gives them something to do until Jake and Alicia come back with dinner. The community is having a massive cookout tonight and their siblings promised to bring them food along with their deliveries to the militia members on duty. 

“Alright,” Troy says before clicking his tongue, face scrunching up in thought a moment before he grins and asks, “Favorite color?”. 

“Purple. Yours?” Nick asks, already glad he suggested this. 

“Green,” Troy answers easy enough as he stands and comes around to lift Nick’s legs and sit on the couch with them resting across his lap. ”What kind of music do you like?” 

“Alt-rock and oldies. Do you listen to anything besides metal?” 

“Oldies and folk rock.” 

“Folk rock?” Nick asks with one eyebrow raised as he resists the urge to laugh. 

“Don’t you judge me, Nicky. It’s good music.” Troy manages to say with a totally straight face, though Nick is almost certain Troy is just fucking with him. 

“Fine, no judging. That goes for you too. Now, what was your favorite book as a kid?“ Nick finds himself asking. The living room is full of books. More than he thinks he might have ever read, and he doubts any are for kids, but they got him wondering. 

Blinking in surprise, Troy stays silent for a long moment before the answer seems to come to him. “Alice in Wonderland. What was yours?” 

“Peter Pan. Did you ever steal a drink from your parents' liquor cabinet?” Nick asks, a hint of mischief rising inside him. He knows Troy doesn’t drink. Doesn’t want to after the way he grew up. But Nick is curious. 

“Nope. The smell alone always made me wanna puke. Didn‘t even take a drink when Big Otto gave me a beer on my 21 st birthday.” The face Troy makes as he answers is almost comical. He looks disgusted. 

“How old are you anyway?” Nick asks, forgetting it’s not his turn. 

“That’s a second question,” Troy points out with a chuckle. “I’m twenty-three. Now I get to ask two questions.” The look Troy gives him is all amusement even as he hums and starts to rub one of Nick’s feet while he thinks. ”What was your other parent? I know Madison is your mom and an Alpha, and you know Big Otto was an Alpha and my mother was an Omega. So, what about yours?” 

“My dad was a Beta,” Nick answers with a shake of his head. It’s probably not a surprise, given that Travis was too and Troy knows that he and Madison were engaged. 

“What’s the weirdest thing you believed as a kid?” Troy muses, grinning when Nick looks surprised by the question. 

“That the glow in the dark bears painted on my floor would make monsters burst into flames if they touched them at night,” Nick answers with a laugh after a moments thought. The look Troy gives him is that of utter confusion and he smirks as he elaborates. “It was something my dad said. He painted these bears with a stencil and glow paint because I was scared of the dark. He said they’d keep me safe from monsters. The rest was just me having an overactive imagination.” 

“That beats believing the moon would fall down if I didn’t blow at it before bed...” Troy mumbles, earning a loud laugh from Nick. “What? I was three and Jake would make shit up to distract me. I must have believed that until I was six or seven years old.” 

“Okay, that is a weird one. I was five or six when my dad painted the bears for me.” They smile at each other for a moment before Nick remembers it’s his turn. “Alright, here’s a good one for you. If you could be anywhere else in the world right now, where would it be?” 

To his credit, Troy takes a long moment to think it over before answering with a resolute nod. “Egypt.” 

“Seriously?” Nick asks with a laugh “You’d trade one desert for another?”

“I wanna know if the mummies that didn’t get their brains yanked out their nose are up and walking around,” Troy explains with a shrug like his reasoning is totally valid and logical. 

“Okay... That’s... Actually, I don’t think it works like that but now I want to know too,” Nick agrees after a moments consideration. 

“Anyway,” Troy begins, hands still massaging one of Nick’s feet idly as he thinks. “What’s something you always wanted to do, but never got the chance?” 

Snorting, Nick wiggles his foot out of Troy’s grasp and gets him to start on the other before answering. “I never learned to play guitar. My dad said he’d teach me when I was a kid. And after he died mom tried to bribe me into being sober with lessons. But she never followed through.” 

“Coop could teach you,” Troy notes as he begins to press his thumb into a sore spot on Nick’s foot just right. 

“I’ll keep that in mind for when I’m too fat to go on patrol in a few months, could be a good way to kill time,” Nick says with a shake of his head. “What’s your favorite smell?” 

“If I tell you-you're gonna think I’m just sayin’ it because I like you,” Troy deflects. 

“I agreed to no judging, remember?” 

“That smell after it’s been really hot out and it rains for the first time in weeks. One of my first memories is of sitting on the front porch watching Jake jump around in the puddles and smelling that. After you’d been here a while and I started to pick up that part of your scent I thought I was imagining shit,” Troy admits with a huff of a laugh. 

Nick opens his mouth to tell Troy that he kind of smells like his favorite smell too, but right then the front door opens and Jake and Alicia walk in with dinner in hand. It ends their game for now, but he makes a mental note to get Troy to play another round later on. He feels like he’s starting to understand Troy a little better thanks to it and he finds himself wanting to learn everything he can. 


	6. No Less Real

Nick’s first morning back in his own house finds him wishing he had left a window open. The lingering smell of pissed off Alpha is enough to make his stomach lurch. And that’s saying something given that your parents' scent is supposed to be a comfort when pregnant, regardless of their mood. Clearly, someone was bullshitting Nick when they taught him that. 

He knew Madison would have come looking to talk to him. It shouldn’t surprise him that her scent is lingering. But he’s still not happy about it. This is his home, not hers. He’s been the one rebuilding it from scratch. Jeremiah helped at first. Probably would have kept helping if his mom hadn’t killed the old Alpha. But the fact remains that she sure as hell hasn’t made any moves to help him here.

There are only two working windows in the living room at the moment, and he opens them both, breathing a sigh of relief at the gust of fresh air that makes its way inside. It’s still early. Enough so that the colors of early dawn haven’t faded from the sky yet. It should be early enough that he can get in a shower, change, and head out for morning patrol with Jimmie before Madison is even out of bed.

The members of the militia, as well as Jake and Alicia, kept Madison away for the past few days, just as promised. And while Troy and Nick have come to the agreement that they can let the word out that they’re together and the baby is Troy’s, they both want to make Madison wait a while longer. After the way she overreacted she can just deal with it.

They had to tell the militia, of course, and they’re all loyal to Nick and Troy so none of them are talking. Which is great because at least a few of them have been stopped and grilled by Madison like she’s trying to figure out if the other parent is one of them.

So far she hasn’t even seemed to consider Troy, which is kind of hilarious given the relationship between them. But then again he supposes she probably thinks Nick would never go for him with the way he acts like a hot-head Alpha in front of the rest of the ranch more often than not. Nick only ever dated Beta’s and other Omega’s before the world ended, so he guesses her logic is sound.

Shaking his head he grabs a clean pair of fatigues from the little dresser he has set up in the corner and makes his way into the bathroom for a quick shower. He almost regrets washing the combined scent of he and Troy from his body, but he needs a shower and if he smells like Troy when he runs into his mom then things could go bad very quickly.

He leaves the window open when he heads out a little later to meet up with Jimmie. It’s looking like it’ll be a warm day, and he really doesn’t feel like coming home to the stale air and lingering scent of his mothers' anger again.

Despite the morning sickness that’s become a near constant over the last week, Nick finds himself enjoying the short walk down the dirt road that leads away from his home and in the direction of the area that has become like a town square. He’s to meet up with other members of the militia for a quick breakfast before he heads out. Going for the whole safety in numbers schtick until they know if Madison is going to have another meltdown.

This early only the farmers, militia, and cooks are awake, and Nick smiles and says good morning to everyone even though a small part of him wants to squirm under the looks he gets from a handful of people. He’s a pregnant Omega that’s not married in a community of mostly hicks. He knew what this was gonna be like.

To his surprise though no one says a word about his condition or the lack of a mate. No one but Karen, who congratulates him and gives him a thermos full of lemon and ginger tea to take on his shift today along with his bowl of fruit and cup of coffee. 

It’s unexpected and gets him smiling. His smile only grows when he says Troy over at one of the picnic tables, food already in front of him as he chats with a few of the other members of the Militia. He takes up the seat opposite Troy’s one foot reaching out to bump Troy’s as he grins and says morning.

“You wanna drive today?” Jimmie asks from his place farther down the table. He’s just started his breakfast as well, having only arrived a few moments before Nick, and he doesn’t look like he’s in any hurt to finish and get out there.

“That would depend on if you plan to keep watch or if you plan to take a nap,” Nick replies with a smirk before popping a piece of melon into his mouth.

A few of the other members of the militia laugh and Jimmie looks a little offended before grinning back. “Like I could sleep with the way you drive. Besides, you know I wouldn’t do that to you.”

“Oh? So that time I caught you snoring behind your sunglasses was just a fluke then?” Nick asks, tone mock innocent and oh so sweet. He even bats his lashes for effect. “Because I seem to recall you swearing you just were putting them on because you had a hangover.”

Jimmies face starts to go red and he grumbles something about Nick being no fun before shoving a bite of toast in his mouth. There are a few more laughs before the other men go back to talking about this and that. 

The good mood at the breakfast table is cut short by the approach of hurried footsteps. 

Troy and a few of the other members of the militia are up and on the verge of growing before Nick and even turn to face his mother.

She stops a few feet away, arms crossing over her chest as she takes in the sight of Nick, in his camo and surrounded by the other members of the militia. It probably looks a bit like a pack of wolves protecting one of their own, and that thought makes Nick want to laugh despite the unease he feels at the situation.

“Nick,” Madison says in surprisingly calm manner despite the tense way she holds herself. “I’ve been looking all over for you. Can we please talk?”

Eyeing her suspiciously, Nick nods and moves to stand. He hears a low growl escape Troy and he turns his head just enough to shoot him what he hopes is a look that reads ‘relax, I got this’.

He keeps his distance as they walk off to stand on the other side of the closest set of barracks. It’s close enough that if she does flip the others will be there in seconds to help him. Not that he thinks he’ll need their help. She’s never hit him in public before. And they’re still in view of some of the farmers that are finishing up breakfast.

“Alright, we’re alone. Talk.” Nick can’t help but cross his arms in front of himself as he moves to stand with his back to the open air and not against the wall of the barracks like he normally would. Having his back to something makes it harder to duck if she gets mad, and he does not want to be an easy target.

Heaving a tired sigh Madison raises a hand and pinches the bridge of her nose before shaking her head and looking at him with calculating eyes. “Are you ready to tell me who the other parent is yet?”

It’s the question Nick expected, but a small part of him had really been hoping she wouldn’t ask.

“No, I’m not. We’re still working things out.” The urge to tell her she doesn’t deserve to know after how she reacted before is strong, but he doesn’t want to risk making her mad.

“This is ridiculous, Nick. I’m your mother. I’m always going to be a part of your life, that means I’m always going to be a part of that babies life. You can’t seriously think it’s alright to keep this from me?” she argues. Her tone is pleading, but Nick can feel how fake it is. It reminds him of the other times he’s seen her lie to someone's face. She only wants to know so she can use this against one or both of them somehow if she doesn’t like who it is.

“Honestly mom, I hate not telling you. But you won’t like the answer so just drop it until we’re ready for everyone on the ranch to know!” Nick can’t help but snap a little towards the end. It’s too early for this and the scent of irritated Alpha is making his stomach roll, which is a shame because he’d been feeling great for the last fifteen minutes while he was eating with his friends. All the happy Alpha and Beta scents having a calming effect on his system.

“What do you mean I won’t like the answer?” Madison demands as she reaches out to grab Nick by the arm where he had turned to start walking back to the others. Her grip is harsh enough that Nick actually winces and lets out a small sound of distress from it as he stops and faces her. “Damn it, Nick, stop running away from me! I’m sick of your attitude towards me! What kind of parent do you think you’re gonna be if you can’t even treat your own with respect!”

That snaps something inside of Nick and he yanks his arm from Madison’s gasp with a deep growl that makes her eyes go wide. “Gee, mom, I don’t know. One that listens to their kids, maybe? I’m almost twenty years old and you can’t even trust me to tell you something when I’m ready!” 

For the briefest moment Madison looks taken aback by Nick’s outburst, but that’s quickly replaced with anger as she reaches out to grab his arm again, which he dodges by taking a quick step back. “You want to be treated like an adult? Then act like one! You don’t know the first thing about raising a child and you and the other parent clearly aren’t on good terms if you can’t even tell me or anyone else who they are! Were you even thinking when you slept with them or did you just fall into their bed after a night of drinking with those idiots in the militia!”

Almost as if summoned by her words, Troy, Blake, Cooper, Jimmie and the rest all round the corner and come to flank Nick. Not moving in front of him, just standing around to offer support if needed. Troy’s growling as he locks eyes with Madison, and for the most part the others are focused on Nick and if he’s alright.

“Madison I think it’s time you leave. Go back to your barracks and stop causing a scene or I’ll have to have a talk with Jake about your aggressive outbursts.” Troy’s tone is low and firm, the edge of a growl making his words sound more like a threat than an order.

Scoffing, Madison crosses her arms once again and squares her shoulders. Troy is much bigger than her. Most of the members of the militia are. But she’s an angry mother Alpha who feels she’s in the right here. She isn’t going anywhere.

“Stay out of this Troy, this is between me and my son,” Madison growls right back, challenge clear in her eyes.

When Troy doesn’t back down it only takes the blink of an eye for Madison to figure things out.

“It’s you!” She says, voice going dangerously low. “Of course it is! You and Nick are always spending time together and you’re always giving him those looks!” her voice raises as she speaks until she’s practically yelling now. 

“Are you out of your damn mind, Nick! I thought you were smarter than this! How could you go and sleep with the guy that nearly killed you and your girlfriend! That got Travis killed!”

“I don’t know, mom? How could you sleep with Walker knowing he killed Travis when he shot at the helicopter?” Nick finds himself shouting back as he steps forward. He knows the others have his back, they won’t let Madison lay a finger on him and that gives him the strength he needs to speak up. 

“You act like you run this place! Like you’re so important just because you shot one man and slept with another! Well, I’m not going to put up with it any longer! Yes, Troy’s the other parent to my child. We’re going to give being together a shot. And I’ve decided I don’t want you having anything to do with me my or baby so long as you think you have the right to treat others like dirt. I’m done.”

With that Nick turns to Troy, who looks honestly impressed, even as Nick grabs him by the collar of his jacket and pulls him forward for a longer than necessary kiss. He can hear the gasp from his mother at that, and fortunately, her stunned silence carries on even as he pulls away and looks to Jimmie, who’s grinning with pride along with many of the others. “Let’s go, I’m driving.”

As they walk away Nick can hear Madison growl as the remaining members of the militia tell her she needs to go with them to speak to Jake. 

There’s no sign of Troy, Jake, Madison or Walker when they get back from patrol, and for the briefest moment Nick is worried, but then Alicia tells him that they’re up at the Otto house having a long overdue discussion about who really runs the ranch and what Madison is and isn’t allowed to do in the name of their group. That night Nick goes to bed with Troy by his side, a new lock on the door of his home, and the feeling that their future is looking bright at last. 


	7. Try and Explain Myself

The next day finds Nick and Troy waking to a knock on their door not long after dawn breaks. 

Alicia comes bearing a thermos full of tea and news that she asks them to sit down at the table for. “Mom’s being exiled,” she says once they’ve all taken a seat and cups of tea have been doled out. 

Nick knows why without being told, but the look Troy gives is something akin to a confused puppy. His brow furrowed and head tilted a little as he waits for Alicia to explain further, his sleep addled brain the only reason he hasn’t really reacted to the statement. Nick grabs his hand where it rests on the table and laces their fingers together to help keep the other man grounded for what comes next.

“Why wasn’t I involved in this decision? Jake should have come and got me before they decided to throw her out.” Troy’s confusion looks like it might start to give way to anger as things start to sink in and Nick leans into his side in an attempt to keep him calm. It seems to work, at least a little, as the Alpha leans into him as well and seems to sag a little at the way their scents mix when they’re close.

Sighing, Alicia does her best to keep calm when she speaks again. “He didn’t call you because he didn’t want to take you away from Nick after the way things have been the last few days. As for why she was banished, Jake wants to tell you himself. I just came to give you both a heads up before you went for breakfast and found everyone gossiping.”

Both Nick and Alicia can see the gears turning in Troy’s head as he pulls away from Nick and gets up from the table. He smells aggravated. And moves like a caged animal, tense and ready to attack as he grabs the bag of clothes he brought over and disappears into the bathroom.

“You know what this is about, don’t you?” Alicia asks once Troy’s out of earshot, voice soft enough that Nick barely hears it.

Turning back to face her, Nick gives a sad smile. “Yeah.”

They sit silently until Troy is done getting dressed. He clearly wants to bolt and find out what’s going on, but he knows this has to do with Nick and Alicia as well and he at least has the mind to wait for Nick to get dressed before leading them out to the truck and driving them all up to the Otto homestead to speak with Jake.

Troy walks right inside once they’re out of the truck, not even bothering to announce his presence as it is his home and he knows Jake is expecting him. Nick and Alicia follow close behind, trading worried looks as they go.

Sure enough, Jake is sitting on the living room couch waiting, hunched forward with his elbows on his knees and his hands clasped in front of him as he looks down at an old photo album that’s resting on the coffee table. He has a distant look in his eyes until he notices Troy and the others walk in, and it has Nick reaching out to take Troy’s hand on instinct.

“Did Alicia tell you what’s happening?” Jake asks as he stands up and moves to allow the Clark siblings to take the couch while he and Troy take up the two armchairs opposite it.

“She told me you and the others decided to banish Madison. Care to fill me in on why I wasn’t called in to give my opinion on the matter? We agreed to run this place together, Jake. Not exactly democratic to make a decision like this without me, brother.” The irritation is clear in Troy’s voice and it’s obvious from the way he’s holding himself that he’s ready for an argument of some kind.

Sighing, Jake runs a hand over his face, rubbing his eyes a little before giving his brother a sad look. He looks exhausted, like he hasn’t slept, dark circles under his eyes and a bit more stubble than usual. “It came to light after Madison’s outburst yesterday that she’s been lying to all of us. After you left things continued to escalate and beyond what you had heard.”

Troy nods, remembering how Madison had growled and actually punched Coop before agreeing to go speak to Jake and Walker about her outbursts and disruptions. Troy stuck around long enough to listen to her try and bullshit her way through being the concerned mother. He learned more than he’d care to admit in those few minutes that he’d stuck around. 

That Nicks father had apparently killed himself. How Nick is so much like the man that she’s  _ concerned _ for him as well as the baby, especially with someone like Troy as the father.

That one got him growling and promptly sent out to do anything but attack the other Alpha. He ended up taking the members of the militia that weren’t on duty out to the practice range and had them run drills with him until he was ready to collapse.

“What else did she say,” Troy says, practically a sneer at the memory of how she tried to make Nick sound unstable and unable to decide for himself. The poor little Omega that was tricked and unable to see reason or logic from years of drug use.

“Things escalated after a while of her trying to talk us in circles about how important she is to running the ranch. She got frustrated and eventually let slip that she had a hand in what happened to dad.” The look in Jake's’ eyes is heartbreaking as he speaks, and Nick can see the moment the gears in Troy’s head come to a screeching halt.

“Dad killed himself,” Troy says almost defensively. “Madison heard the shot and got to him before we did.” It’s the story Madison had told. 

The fake one. Nick had gotten to the house just after Madison pulled the trigger. He saw her holding the gun and Jeremiah’s dead body through the window and bolted. Too scared of what hell was about to rain down on their family. He should have known she would play it off as a suicide back then.

“No, Troy, Madison shot him. Supposedly because dad was willing to let the members of the nation kill us all before he would give up any part of the ranch,” Jake explains slowly. Tears start to well up in his eyes and he looks torn between wanting to hug Troy and not wanting to get punched.

Troy for his part looks somewhere between horrified and furious. Even Nick isn’t sure what to do with his reaction at the moment.

“So she just shot him? Why didn’t she come to us? We could have talked to him! He was stubborn but you always had a way of getting through to him! What made her think she had the right to do that!” Troy starts slowly, voice rising in volume as his anger rises. By the end of it, he’s standing and starting to pace back and forth in the space between the chairs and coffee table.

“She thought she was doing us a favor. That she was saving all our lives and securing her place as a leader here,” Jake replies weakly. The scent of upset Alpha filling the room from both parties and mixing with the scent of upset and concerned Omega coming from Alicia and Nick.

A small part of Nick always finds it odd the way their scents mix when they’re together. It’s like being in a botanical garden almost. Only part of it’s been burned with napalm thanks to the burnt notes of his scent.

The sour notes that join the mix only add to the unpleasant acrid notes and Nick has to get up and open a window before he ends up puking. He already felt his morning sickness kicking up, and his feelings about his mother aren’t helping. The scent in here is just the tipping point that has him gasping.

Troy pauses his pacing and watching Nick stumble to the window and open it before letting himself drop to his knees and lean so his face is right in the path of the breeze that’s now coming in. That seems to bring Troy back to himself, at least partially, and he comes to kneel beside him with a hand coming to rub Nick’s back as he tries to take slow breaths to ease his nausea.  

“Where is she now?” The question is directed at Jake, though Troy keeps his eyes on Nick as he continues to gasp for fresh air and look like he’s about to be sick.

“She’s locked up with a few men from the militia and nation keeping guard. She’s being given a bag of supplies and we’re taking her to the bazaar after breakfast,” Jake explains as he moves to stand and start pacing as Troy had been before. “Look, I know you’re upset, but Walker and I talked to a few of the others and it was agreed upon that this was the right thing to do.”

“She should be left in the middle of the desert to fend for herself,” Troy snaps with a growl, hand stilling where it had been rubbing Nick’s back. “The things she’s done, she doesn’t deserve that kindness, Jake”

Nick can’t help but agree here. His mother has always done what she wanted and claimed it was for the greater good when it was really to server her and what she wants. He may have done selfish things more times than he can count, but even he doesn’t bullshit people the way she does. “What else did she say?”

All eyes go to Nick, who still looks pale and shaky where he looks back at them from in front of the open window. 

“She wouldn’t admit something like that unless she was getting desperate. What else did she say?” Nick asks again, not sure he wants to know if she said anything about him or their family, but he wants to know if she told them about how she abused him. How she made their father miserable. He isn’t sure but he has a feeling she said more before confessing to having killed Big Otto.

“Nick, are you sure you want to know? You don’t look so good. We can talk another time,” Jake offers, concern clear on his face even as Alicia stands and puts a hand on his arm to reassure him.

“I want to know now, before you kick her out,” Nick says with a nod before turning to sit with his back to the bit of wall below the window. The back of his head rests against the edge of the sill and he finds Troy sitting at his side, anger apparently forgotten for the moment in favor of making sure Nick is okay.

Sighing, Jake comes forward and sits on the floor a few feet in front of Nick so the breeze from the open window will keep blowing his scent away and not bother the pregnant Omega further. He waits for Alicia to take a seat beside him and loops an arm around his as she leans into his side before he starts to speak again.

“She started off by trying to justify her outbursts over the last few days. Claiming that you’re unstable and weren’t thinking straight. We asked her for some kind of proof of that and she said you had a past of drug abuse and depression. She also said your father had depression and killed himself,” Jake looks regretful as he speaks, gaze dropping from Nick’s a few times.

Nick already feels nausea growing stronger at what information his mother shared. “Yeah, I’m an addict. I’ve always had an addictive personality. As for having depression, I mean yeah I’ve had it off and on but never that bad. But… She seriously said that about dad?”

Nodding, Jake licks his lips and looks to Alicia where she’s pressed into his side. The information is clearly getting to her too, but she’s holding together well.

“She did. She said she was concerned that you might do something to hurt yourself and the baby and that you needed to be looked after by her and Alicia, whether you like it or not,” That gets Troy growling and Nick wanting to scream. 

“We told her we would talk to you but that she needed to respect the way we agreed to run things here and she needed to handle this like any other member of the community. She got upset at that and started arguing that she isn’t just any member of the community. That she sacrificed so much for us already and she took on the burden that came with Jeremiah's ignorance and stubborn ways.”

Troy growls louder at that but keeps from speaking as Nick grabs his hand and places it over his lower stomach. The warmth of his hand seeps through the material of his shirt and helps Nick feel just a little better, the evidence clear as he starts to lean into Troy so his head rests on the Alpha’s shoulder and his breathing becomes a bit more normal.

“Walker looked disturbed by her saying that and when we asked what she meant she started to rant about how she had to do it or he would have gotten us all killed. She said she wouldn’t let that happen. Not after everything else she had lost.” Jake looks like he wants to stop, like he’s going to become a wreck any minute. Instead, he wraps an arm around Alicia and pulls her tight against his side before he continues.

“I asked her what she did and she just kind of got this look in her eyes like she hadn’t meant to say anything. She tried to backpedal, say that she just meant she felt responsible for dad taking his life. It as a total lie. I may not have been a lawyer for very long, but I know when someone is hiding the truth. Walker and I both kept pressing and eventually she snapped and said she had to do it or he would have gotten everyone on the ranch killed. She said she sacrificed too much for this place to let dad throw it all away over his pride. Then she tried to say she deserves to be the leader here because of everything she’s done and that we should be thanking her.”

“She’s lost her damn mind,” Troy says with a low growl that makes Nick tighten the hold he has on the hand that’s still resting over his stomach. “She doesn’t deserve to be exiled, she deserves to be shot like she shot dad!”

“I’m not disagreeing with you, but we need to handle this carefully. She has friends here now. If we do something like that it could cause a ruckus and bring back the tension that we’ve finally dealt with between the people. It’s better to take the peaceful course here and exile her, much as I agree you for once on something like this it’s in our best interest to set an example. We have a community to run and we need to keep level heads.”

“He’s right, Troy. Shooting her doesn’t bring your father back and it doesn’t keep things from boiling over here. Let them take her away. It’ll be alright,” Nick says softly with his face turned into Troy’s shoulder in a way that has him basically speaking against his throat. His breath making the Alpha shiver slightly.

“She can’t get away with this…” Troy seethes, much calmer and quieter than before.

“She won’t, Troy, don’t you see that? She did all of this because of me and Nick. She’s greedy and she thinks she has to protect us even though we’re adults. Exiling her means she loses us. And her grandchild. It’s a fate worse than death to her,” Alicia’s tone is somber as she looks at Nick and Troy with unwavering, sad green eyes. “It’s not worth it to kill her.”

That seems to strike a chord somewhere with Troy and he sags a little, leaning into Nick and letting his head tilt to rest against the others. “If she tries anything, and I mean anything, I will give my men orders to shoot on sight.”

Jake nods his understanding and doesn’t argue. If Madison ever did try to come back it would cause a lot of trouble and he knows after the long talk he had with Walker that the other man would agree to this. Probably will tell his people the same thing once Madison is gone, given how she played him as well in all of this.

“So what now?” Nick asks as he lets his eyes slip closed. He really wishes he hadn’t gotten out of bed today.

“Now, the three of you stay here and I’ll oversee the group taking Madison to the Bazaar. If the rest of you come along she might try to pull something and I don’t want to risk it. It’ll just be me, Walker, Blake, and a few others from both sides of the community to make sure things go smoothly.” Jake says with a surprising amount of authority in his voice given how close to tears he’s looked for the last several minutes.

“We can do that,” Nick finds himself saying as he shifts closer to Troy. The smell of anger is fading, replaced with sorrow. It doesn’t make Nick’s stomach ache and roll like before and he finds himself turning his head and pressing his nose to Troy’s throat to breathe him in better.

“Yeah, we’ll stay here. Just have someone let us know when you’ve left.” Alicia agrees before kissing Jake on the cheek and pulling away. A moment later she comes to sit beside Nick, leaning into her brothers' side. They would cuddle up like this often as kids. Especially when their parents argued or Madison had been drinking and was scaring one or both of them.

Nick wraps an arm around her shoulder and pulls her close even as he keeps he face pressed into the crook of Troy’s neck. He can feel Troy tense at Alicia joining them in their little bubble of safety, but he quickly relaxes at the way her presence helps relax Nick and gets his breathing the rest of the way back to normal.

Troy doesn’t even speak, just gives his brother a tired look with a slight nod before letting his eyes close and turning his head so his nose is buried in Nick’s hair.

Jake leaves a few minutes later, having showered and gotten a few things together for his trip. He’s back by late evening thanks to car trouble, and when he returns he finds Nick, Troy, and Alicia in basically the same position as when he left, though they moved to the couch at some point during the day. They’re all sleep, and he toes off his boots and removes his jacket as quietly as he can before slipping into the space behind Alicia and wrapping an arm around her.

It’s a little unusual to be cuddling in a heap like this as adults, but Jake figures they’re all family at this point. After everything they’ve been through. And they all need some comfort right now. He falls asleep to the sound of three sets of steady breathing and the combined warmth of his family on the barely big enough couch beside him.


	8. I Wish (All The Wolves Weren't Disguised As Lambs)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains Spanish, which was translated by AnonIA for me because I suck at languages and they're awesome <3

Six months into his pregnancy Nick is ready to murder someone. Everyone around the ranch treats him like he’s going to break. The only exception is the members of the militia that know him and know he will lose his shit if one more person tells him he should be spending time at home taking care of himself and getting ready for the baby.

He knows Omega males don’t carry for 9 months like females. He knows he only has a month and a half to two months before he has the baby. He’s not an idiot or an invalid. He just gets so fucking bored sitting at home now that he and Troy have finished rebuilding it. They even got the second bedroom and the crib finished a month sooner than expected. 

And there’s no way in hell he would get away with trying to help with the wall construction. Like using a welding torch is so damn dangerous for him and the baby. They have the protective gear for a reason. Even Jake said it would be fine, but the other workers adamantly refused to let him help.

If it weren’t for today's trade mission to the Bazaar he might have snapped. But the run is happening as planned and he’s in Troy’s pickup riding shotgun while Blake, Coop, and Alicia follow behind in one of those big flatbed trucks they’ve been using to move the shipping containers for the walls.

The plan is to go in and hopefully set up a trade for the parts needed to repair the crane they’ve been using to move said shipping containers into place to make the wall. They’ve searched all the shipyards they can find within a days drive on the coast and can’t find what they need, but word is that’s because someone else already took the parts months ago and now has a shop at the bazaar.

“You’re sure you know enough Spanish to handle this trade?” Troy asks as the Bazaar starts to come into view in the distance. They all talked about this over the last couple of days, and with what they hear the person running the shop has a soft spot for Omegas and speaks Spanish as their first language. Nick and Alicia were the obvious choices for the mission as they’re the youngest Omegas on the ranch that aren’t children.

“Yes, I’m sure. Just try and relax, Troy. We’ll be in and out before you know it. I even heard there’s a Cantina in this place. You can take me to lunch after the deal is made to celebrate.” Nick boasts as he shifts in his seat a little. He still can’t get used to how big he’s gotten. He kind of feels like he’s swallowed a basketball half the time.

“Fine. You land the deal and I’ll buy you lunch. But if Alicia asks I made you eat that healthy shit she packed in the cooler.” The look of disgust on Troy’s face at the mention of the salad and other greens his sister fixed is almost comical.

“You’re really that scared of my sister finding out I didn’t eat healthy for a single meal?” Nick asks with a chuckle. The baby seems to have an opinion here too, as they pick right then to kick Nick where his hand rests on his stomach. His face screws up at the sensation and now it’s Troy’s turn to laugh.

“They got you good that time, huh?” he asks, knowing by now what faces Nick makes when the baby does something like kick a spot that’s painful or moves in a way that just feels fucking weird.

“I think they’re gonna be a runner with the way they keep squirming,” Nick grumbles as he rubs at his stomach, another kick coming not long after. “I ran around a lot when I was little.”

“You do have a runner’s build,” Troy agrees with a slight nod.

“Says the guy with Gazelle legs,” Nick counters with a snort. He is pretty proud of the fact that he hasn’t gotten very big so far. The doctor back on the ranch said it’s because all the extra calories he’s been eating are going straight to the baby. Meaning even though Omega males usually have smaller babies, his is likely to be on the big side of small. He’s not really too excited about that fact, but hey, if the baby is healthy he won’t complain… much…

“I’m two inches taller than you, my legs ain’t that much longer than yours.” Troy rolls his eyes but otherwise keeps them on the road ahead as he navigates his way into the bazaar parking lot. “You ready?”

“As I’ll ever be,” Nick says with a grin as they pull off to the side and wait for the others to pull up behind them.

It’s easy enough to trade their way inside, they even end up with enough credit to do some shopping after if they play their cards right. Which makes the others happy given the variety of goods people are selling.

Finding the merchant with the crane parts doesn’t take long. Their area of the old bullfighting arena is right near the back by an old set of large doors. Several spare parts and smaller crane arms and whatnot are propped against the sides of the arena wall, displaying them for all to see. The one they need is apparently in a secure area on the other side of the doors.

It turns out the merchant is an older female Alpha. Her weakness for Omegas comes from having had three children that presented as such. They were her whole world before everything burned, and when she sees that Nick and Alicia are not only Omegas but that Nick is also pregnant? Well, she can’t help but fuss and fawn and agree to trade them the parts they need in trade for a small shipment of fresh vegetables, seeds, and a single rifle with three boxes of ammo.

It’s much less than they were expecting to have to offer, and in the end, Nick finds himself agreeing to come back and visit after the baby is born so the old woman can see a little glimmer of hope for the future. It’s both sweet and sad to think about.

Everyone separates after that with the exception of Nick and Troy. They each have a walkie to communicate with if needed and they all agreed on a plan to meet up at the vehicles in an hour once Blake and Coop have gotten the parts and spare crane arm loaded on the flatbed and had a chance to look around.

Stomach rumbling, Nick grabs Troy by the hand and heads in the direction of the Cantina. He doesn’t actually know where he’s going, but he smells food and that’s good enough. 

Sure enough on the opposite side of the bazaar is a decent sized seating area with some picnic tables and the smell of food wafting over from a few grills and other kinds of cooking stations. There are even waitresses walking around taking orders and handing out drinks.

For the briefest moment, Nick longs for a beer, even though he never actually liked the taste. Funny what you want when you can’t have it anymore. In any case, he brushes the thought aside and lets go of Troy’s hand to walk ahead and find a space for them to sit. 

It’s busy, most tables full, but there looks to be a small open space at the end of one table that would fit both of them.

Nick nearly trips when he recognizes the person seated at the end of said table. Her back is to him, but he’d know her anywhere.

Luciana turns her head to ask the woman beside her a question and it’s clear she’s spotted Nick out of the corner of her eye from the way she freezes mid-sentence and her eyes grow wide. Her friend asks her if she’s alright and she waves him off as she turns and moves to stand and face Nick with a dazed expression.

“Hey, Luci…” Nick says weakly, unsure what else to say. He had thought if she was anywhere, it would be Mexicali. He never doubted she was still alive. She’s too clever not to be. But seeing her here, now, is such a shock that he feels completely off-kilter all of the sudden.

“Nick,” she says in response before her eye flick over to where Nick is sure Troy is also frozen a few paces behind him. “I take it you’re still living on the ranch?”

Nick wants to growl at the flippant way she says it. The ranch isn’t a bad place. It’s gotten a lot better in the past 5 months. Especially since his mom was banished and stopped poisoning people against each other. 

“Yeah, I am, I take it you didn’t find your friends in Mexicali,” Nick says as he crosses his arms over his chest, unintentionally drawing her gaze lower and bringing attention to his stomach.

Luciana’s eyes grow wide when she realizes what she’s seeing and she meets his gaze with a look of shock. “ Ay, Dios mío! Estas embarazado!” ~

Shifting a little uncomfortably and crossing his arms tighter, Nick nods. “Yeah… About six months along,” he admits, not sure he wants to tell her any more than that. She had only been gone for 5 days when he decided to sleep with Troy. Not that he regrets it, but he doesn’t feel like he has to explain his choices to her after everything that happened.

Instead of anger or further shock, Luciana’s expression shifts to that of a warm smile. “That’s… I’m glad you found someone. Even it was in that place. Where’s the other parent? Are they here too?” She asks, looking past Nick and Troy, whos still a few feet behind, in search of any other faces that she might have seen in her few days on the ranch.

A moment later Nick feels Troy stepping beside him and wrapping an arm around his waist, hand settling on the side of his stomach as he pulls Nick close. “That would be me.” His tone is all smug pride and it makes Nick want to roll his eyes. Of course, he has to gloat a little at being the one that got Nick in the end.

“You’re kidding,” Luciana says with a laugh that makes Nick wince in response. When they don’t separate or confirm that it’s a joke, her face drops. “Ese hijo de puta mato a mi gente! Planeaba matarnos a nosotros también!” *

“I’m not going to defend or justify his actions, Luciana. What he did was inexcusable, but things have changed and I don’t expect you to ever be able to understand that,” Nick finds himself stepping out of the warmth of Troy’s embrace and right into Luciana’s face.

“Acaso has perdido la cabeza? Como pudiste?!” she practically yells, drawing the attention of several people around them. “He’s a psychopath!” **

“A si? Pues el es parte de mi familia ahora! Por que a diferencia de ti, el si se quedo a pesar de que las cosas se pusieron mal! No tienes ningún derecho, ninguno, de juzgarme después de lo que me hiciste pasar!” Nick seethes back, anger he didn’t know he still felt towards her coming to the surface and finding an outlet at last. “Goodbye, Luciana. Have a nice life.”***

With that Nick turns and walks back over to Troy, leaving Luciana to stand stunned with tears starting to form in her eyes as she watches Nick take Troy’s hand and leave the crowded cantina as quickly as possible.

Once they’re far enough away Troy pulls Nick close, wrapping an arm around his shoulder and nuzzling the side of his head a little as they keep walking towards the exit. “What did you say to her before we left just now?” Troy can smell how upset he is, and he knows if he doesn’t ask now, Nick might clam up until they get home and he can coax it out of him with a back rub and a few stolen cookies from the pantry.

Sighing, Nick lets himself lean into Troy’s side as they walk, and he takes comfort in his presence. “Roughly translation, I told her you’re part of my family and that you’ve stuck by me when things got bad, unlike her. And I told her she had no right to judge me after what she put me through.”

Much to Nick’s surprise, Troy stops them both, a look in his eyes that Nick’s only seen a few times before. It’s a kind of warmth in those baby blues that he only gets when Nick calls them family. “You know I love you, right?”

It’s the first time Troy’s said it, and it might be the timing or the pregnancy hormones or a combination thereof but those words get Nick tearing up. He nods his head quickly, trying to keep his emotions in check. “I love you too,” he says before grabbing Troy by his shirt collar and pulling him forward for a kiss that doesn’t last nearly as long as either of them would like.

When they break apart Nick grins despite the tears fighting to escape the corners of his eyes, and Troy brings both hands up to cup his face and brush the few that escape away with his thumbs. “Come on, I’ll radio the others that we’re bugging out early. We’ll get headed as soon as everyone’s loaded up.”

Nick leans in and gives Troy one more quick peck on the lips before pulling back and grabbing hold of one of Troy’s hands. He gives him one more smile before turning and starting to lead them back to the entrance.

The others are a little upset that their time at the bazaar has been cut short, but they understand when Troy barks over the radio that they ran into Luciana and don’t want to stick around for another chance encounter.

Nick is pressed against Troy’s side the whole drive home, Troy driving with one hand on the wheel and the other arm wrapped around Nick so his hand rests on the swell of his stomach. Nick’s own hand rests on top of Troy’s and every once in a while they feel the baby kick and move underneath.

None of the others ask what happened when they ran into Luciana, but Alicia gives Nick a knowing look and a hug before going to meet up with Jake and the others to deal with getting the crane parts ready for replacing.

Nick’s too exhausted emotionally and physically to talk, which Troy understands. He’s seen Nick get like that a few times before. Only getting a couple of words out of him at most and only if it’s important. So he doesn’t try to make him speak. Just drives him home, takes a nice warm shower with him, and gets a fire going to warm the house up and drive out the slight February chill before they curl up in bed together with something hot to eat. It’s not long before they both pass out, Nick first as he’s curled into Troy and using him as a pillow while Troy hums some song he doesn’t quite remember the words to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rough translations -  
> ~ "Oh my god! You're pregnant!"  
> * "That sone of a bitch killed my people! He was planning to kill us too!"  
> ** "Have you lost your mind? How could you?!"  
> *** "Yeah? Well, he's part of my family now! Because unlike you, he did stay, even when things got bad. You have not one single right, none, to judge me for what you put me through!"


	9. Running Wild

April 2nd finds Nick just a little over 8 months pregnant and feeling miserable. It’s been raining for three days straight, which is amazing for California in general and for their crops. But it’s leaving Nick feeling even more run down than he did just a few days before. His back aches, his hips are sore, and he would  _ KILL _ for a strawberry malted milkshake right now.

Instead, he has some nasty veggie smoothie monstrosity the doctor told Alicia to make for him to help give extra nutrition his body needs. It tastes like grass and smells like something already digested it. He wants to dump it out the window but he’s afraid it’ll kill the flowers growing beneath.

He’s been in bed all day, too miserable to do anything while Troy is off overseeing some supply run to the Bazaar for new seeds to expand what their foods options are. He promised to try and find strawberries. Or at least the seeds for them so Nick can grow his own in the future.

Alicia came over after Troy left, bringing the death “smoothie” and the things to make him lunch later in the day. 

“Maybe if you take a hot shower you’ll feel better?” Alicia suggests after watching Nick shift around on the bed restlessly for a good ten minutes. She’s been sitting on Troy’s side with a book most of the morning while he read his own. A copy of the Maze Runner that she found in a library that she went to raid with Jake and some others a while back. He’s enjoying it but it’s hard to focus when everything hurts.

“That requires standing,” Nick counters with a groan as he rolls onto his side and looks up at her. “I took three yesterday and they didn’t really help. I don’t know what's worse, the aches from the rain or from my body getting ready to get this little bugger out of me,” he further complains as he rubs at his swollen stomach with the hand not still holding his book.

“At least it won’t be too much longer until then. You smell like aunt Mary before she gave birth,” Alicia points out as she sets her book aside and shifts so she’s laying on the bed facing Nick. It’s more comfortable for Nick since he won’t have to turn his head as much to look at her.

Nick can’t help but snort at that. “You’re saying a smell like hormones and pain.” At least that’s what their aunt smelled like to him. He was like thirteen when their cousin was born. And he remembers hating the smell in her room when they went to visit her. It made his nose itch and his stomach feel weird.

Alicia cracks a smile at that. “Basically, yeah. And sweat. You really could stand to take another shower.”

“Bite me,” Nick grumbles with a halfhearted glare before he winces at a sharp pain in his lower back. It doesn’t feel like a kick. More like a muscle cramp.

“You okay?” Alicia asks, concern clear in her voice.

Nick nods, his eyes having closed tight at the random stab of pain. “I think I’ve been laying down too long. I’m getting a cramp in my back.”

“Do you want me to help you get up so you can walk around and stretch a bit?” She’s already up and walking around the bed before Nick even has his eyes open again.

It takes him a moment to roll to his other side and push himself up to sitting, but he manages just as the cramp in his back flares in pain again. “Fuck this is annoying. I miss when I was on drugs and could lay in the same spot for days without giving a fuck.” He doesn’t really, it’s not bad being clean in the apocalypse. At least when he isn’t eight months pregnant and ready to cry from boredom it isn’t.

“No, you don’t. You just think you do. Just wait until that baby is born and you have to devote all your time to it. Then you’ll miss doing drugs.” The grin she’s giving him as she helps him up is all sass and it makes Nick huff a laugh.

“At least I know I can always dump them on you and Jake for a night now and then,” Nick says as he grins back. Now that he’s standing the cramp in his back seems to ease up a little. He’s still aching all over, but it does kind of feel good to be up. He takes a moment to really stretch before turning to walk out to the living room, Alicia in toe. “Karen offered to babysit too. She said Troy and I deserve to have at least one night a week to ourselves with everything we’ve been through since this all began.”

“You do realize half the people on the ranch are gonna want a turn with that baby. It’s the end of the world and a baby being born is probably like a sign for god to them or something.” Alicia sounds like she’s almost bothered by the idea. Nick probably should be too, but they are part of a community after all, and they’re supposed to look out for each other.

“Well, the saying is ‘it takes a village’, right? I mean, it’s not bad that they wanna help. I think it’s kind of nice. Besides, I doubt it’ll be long before there are more kids being born. There are only so many bottles of suppression pills and birth control in the pantry. And I doubt anyone is going to be manufacturing any in the near future.” Nick can’t even imagine what kind of chemicals it takes to make something like that. He knows some chemistry, was pretty damn good at it even, but that sort of thing is way out of his range of expertise.

“Well, this village seems to have decided your baby is going to be spoiled rotten and have a massive extended family,” Alicia notes as she passes Nick where he’s stopped to stare out the front windows at the falling rain. It’s finally looking green out, and the cows are pretty damn happy with all the fresh grass to graze on, but the rain is making the sky gray and Nick is tired of it.

Nick can’t find anything wrong with that. He wants his baby to grow up loved and taken care of. He wants them to feel like they can trust the people around them. He wants their childhood to be better than his, even if it is the end of the world.

He’s about to ask Alicia to make him some tea when the cramping pain in his back returns with a vengeance and this time he has to grab hold of the wooden chair in front of him and hold on tight for fear of losing his balance.

Alicia is at his side in a flash, arm around his waist to help him stay up. “What’s wrong?”

Nick doesn’t even realize he was gasping for breath until the pain dies down and he’s fully aware of his surroundings once more. “I think that was a contraction,” he grunts as he straightens up and lets go of the chair to rub at his stomach. The baby’s been getting into the right position according to the doctor, and his body has been doing all the gross stuff those classes and birthing books said it would in preparation for him going into labor. But they figured he had a few more days from the way things were progressing.

“I’ll call Jake, we can go to the clinic and have Joe take a look at you,” Alicia says with a nod before turning to grab the walkie that’s kept on the table by the front door. Before Nick can protest Alicia has turned it on and hit the call button. “Jake, it’s Alicia, you out there?”

There’s a crackle of static before a reply comes. “I’m here, is everything alright?”

Alicia spares a glance at her brother before pressing the button to speak. “Nick might be going into labor, can you come pick us up and bring us to the clinic?”

Another short burst of static and, “Sure, I’ll be there in five.”

“You realize this could also just be Braxton Hix contractions, right?” Nick can’t help but note. He hasn’t had them before, but he knows they’re a possibility. He’s kind of hoping that’s not the case though. He’s ready to have the baby. He was ready a few weeks ago. Being the size of a beach ball sucks.

“You realize male Omegas almost never get those, right?” Alicia counters with a roll of her eyes. “Where’s your bag?”

Groaning, this time from the baby kicking his lower ribs, he points to where there is a duffle bag beside the couch. “It takes like 3 minute tops to drive back here, I don’t get why I have to bring a bag of stuff,” Nick complains.

“Because you need clothes for the baby and something comfortable to wear after they’re born.”

Nick wants to argue that his current clothes are fine, but he gets another spike of pain, this time in his back and front that have him groaning and clutching the chair in front of him again. “Fuuuuuck….. If this... is what it’s going to be like until this kid is out of me... I’m seriously considering changing my mind about the whole no drugs birth plan bullshit.”

The sound of a truck pulling up to the front steps draws both their attention to the window, where they can see Jake’s black pickup sitting idle as he jumps out the drivers' side and runs around to make his way to the front door. He didn’t even put on a rain jacket.

A second later the front door opens and a soggy Jake leans in far enough to see them through the water dripping front his hair into his eyes. “Hey, Nick, you holding up alright?” He asks before stepping in and grabbing the duffle from Alicia’s hand like the gentleman he is.

“Peachy,” Nick says with a slightly pained expression. He really isn’t looking forward to what’s to come next.

The smile Jake give him is so understanding and reassuring that Nick wants to cry a little. Stupid hormones.

“Get your coat and let’s get you over to the clinic. I radioed Joe and he’s getting things ready. And Troy and the others are on their way back from the bazaar now,” Jake promises as he shoulders Nick’s back and grabs his raincoat to help him get it on while Alicia grabs her own coat and things.

“You think they’re gonna make it back in time,” Nick can’t help but ask. He isn’t worried, but it would be nice to have Troy there. He’s got Jake and Alicia, but Troy being there would be better.

“I don’t know, but you know he would be here now if he could,” Jake says, still with that smile as he leads them out to the truck.

Another contraction hits halfway to the clinic. This is going to suck.

~~~~~

Troy’s thankful the world ended months ago because there are no damn cops to stop him from speeding at 95 miles an hour in the rain to get back to Nick. He’d go faster if the road wasn’t so bumpy. Coop practically screamed his ear off when they went over 120 on the highway and hit a bump.

All he can think about is Nick and the baby. Their baby that Nick is having right now. His and Nick’s child. It’s fucking insane to think about. He’s pretty sure he’s in shock because he doesn’t feel like he’s been driving all that long and they’re already seeing the ranch in the distance. Looking at the clock on the dash he sees they’ve only been driving about an hour and 45 minutes. So he made it back in half the time it usually takes…

The gate is already open when they reach it, truck slowing to 20 so he doesn’t go barreling into a building if his brakes lock up in the mud. They don’t, and he comes to a stop in the center of the new dubbed village area by the well, killing the engine and putting it in park before it’s even fully stopped.

“Troy, are you-” before Coop can finish the sentence Troy’s out of the truck and running through the rain towards the clinic. It’s not far, but it feels like miles as he runs through the pelting rain to the half-built clinic they started on a few weeks ago to replace the tent.

There’s the smell of blood in the air as he enters, and it’s all he can do not to panic at that. He knew there would be blood. They went over all of this dozens of times.

He’s still running when he reaches the room that he knows they’re using as the delivery room. Just as he reaches the door he hears what can only be described as the softest little cry he’s ever heard in his life.

Throwing the door open he finds Alicia and Jake standing on either side of Nick, with Joe and one of the other medics there. Joe is grinning as he holds up a slightly bloody little bundle that lets out another small cry that makes Troy’s heart clench in his chest.

Nick spots him and smiles despite the exhaustion etched all over his face. “You made it,” he says breathily. Clearly close to passing out from what he’s just accomplished. The room smells like blood and sweat and pain. And also something new. Something Troy can’t quite make out under everything else but knows without a doubt is the scent of their baby.

Troy nods and looks from Nick to the baby that Joe is still holding as he starts to shuck off his soaked coat.

“It’s a girl,” Joe says proudly before taking a small towel from the other medic and wiping the baby girls off a little and laying her down on Nicks chest, where he instantly wraps both arms around her and holds her close.

As soon as the wet coat is off Alicia moves aside and lets Troy come to crouch beside Nick and their child. Up close it’s hard to tell, but it looks like her hair might be brown, like either of theirs, and she’s looking at Nick with blue eyes that mirror Troy’s own in brightness.

Nick huffs a tired laugh at the way Troy seems to have frozen beside him. “It’s okay, you can hold her,” he assures, leaning over a little to let Troy take her.

She’s tiny. Maybe a little over six pounds. But she has chubby arms and legs and looks up at Troy with such beautiful blue eyes he feels like he’s going to be lost in them. After a moment of staring she yawns and sort of sticks her tongue out and that’s what gets Troy. She’s real. A real, living, breathing tiny human. And he helped make her. “Wow…” is all he can bring himself to say as he looks at her.

Joe pats Troy on the shoulder with one hand, giving him a grin when that seems to break the spell and gets Troy to look at him. “Why don’t you let us clean her up and give her a once over and we’ll give her right back, okay, Troy?”

A primal part of Troy wants him to shove the redhead away and growl, but he knows better and hands the little girl over with only slight much trepidation. He wants to curl up with her and Nick and never let them go. Instead, he settles for taking Nick’s hand and kissing his sweaty forehead while the people he trusts take care of their daughter.

“You doin’ alright?” Troy asks as he pulls back to get a better look at Nick. He’s still breathing a bit heavy and smells like distress, blood, and sweat, but otherwise, he seems to be doing good.

“Never better… “ Nick says with a slight wince as he shifts on the delivery bed. “Can I just say I never want to do that again.”

Troy can’t help but laugh. “I promise to try my damndest not to knock you up again.”

That gets a chuckle from Jake, who’s standing off to the side now with Alicia.

“Neither of you were trying in the first place,” Alicia points out with a grin that earns her a glare from both Nick and Troy.

“She has a point,” Nick grumbles before looking past Troy.

A moment later Joe is back with a freshly cleaned up and swaddled baby girl who Troy instantly recognizes as smelling of daisies, a touch of mint, and something a bit like wet grass after the rain. Not exactly like the notes of petrichor but it undoubtedly comes from Nick, just like the hint of daisies comes from Troy. She smells like it just rained on a daisy field and the wind blew in the scent of mint along with it.

With a nod from Nick Joe hands the baby girl to Troy and smiles. “Why don’t you and the others take that baby girl out to the other room while we get Nick cleaned up and ready to go get some rest?”

Troy blinks and looks to Nick, who gives another tired smile in return.

“Go on,” he shoos, eyes never leaving their daughter in Troy’s arms. She looks so tiny when he holds her.

Nodding, Troy and the others filter out, Alicia and Jake only coming in to crowd around and look at their niece once they’re in the recovery room.

They’re both speaking, but none of it is really getting through to Troy. He’s lost in the wide blue eyes that look up at his and the slightly curly light brown hair that covers her head; a shade somewhere between Nicks and his own. He’s taking in the fact that she has his lips and Nicks nose and not the words being said about how beautiful she is. He holds her close and leans in to let his nose brush against the curls atop her head as he takes in the scent that’s a little bit of both his and Nicks and also entirely her own.

“Welcome to the world, Iris Oriana Otto,” Troy says softly before placing a kiss on her forehead. He doesn’t even realize he’s crying until he pulls back and sees the few drops that hit the blanket she’s swaddled in. It takes him a moment to realize why he’s crying. 

He’s happy. He has a family now. A real one that’s all his own and this baby girl is the proof of it. He promises right then and there that he’ll do everything in his power to keep them all safe and make sure that this little girl grows up to a bright future.


	10. Never Been The Type (To Think Twice)

A week later finds Nick waking up to a cold bed at the first light of dawn, which isn’t unusual, but the fact that Iris isn’t in her crib definitely is.

It takes a moment to get himself up to sitting, his body still aching and working on recovering from giving birth. Once he’s up he pads out to the living room, where his suspicions are confirmed. In the early morning light, he spies Troy, sound asleep in the couch with Iris curled up asleep on his chest underneath a soft purple baby blanket that was a gift from another family on the ranch. One hand on her back while the other hangs off the side of the couch.

Times like this he wishes he had a camera. Maybe he’ll ask Blanke or Cooper to get him one from the bazaar next week when they make the next trade run. It’d be nice to get some family pictures while Iris is a baby.

Almost as if she knew she was being thought of, Iris snuffles in her sleep and starts to squirm as she wakes up, effectively waking Troy up at the same time.

Grumbling and not opening his eyes, Troy starts to rub her tiny back and talk to her in a soft tone. “It’s still early, baby girl. Gotta let papa get some more sleep.”

“I’m already awake,” Nick says with a chuckle before making his way over to pick Iris up from Troy’s chest. She’s warm and still sleepy as she blinks at him and reaches out a chubby hand towards his face.Nick grabs it and kisses her tiny fingers before shifting her around to be held mostly in one arm against his chest.

Troy grins as he opens his eyes and looks up at his mate with their daughter. “I got her, you can go back to bed if you want,”

“Thanks but I’m good. I was thinking of having some breakfast anyway,” Nick brushes off, bouncing Iris in his arms a little and reveling in the smile he gets in response. “I’ll feed the sprout if you make me some bacon and eggs?”

Troy snorts in response, but gets up nonetheless and stretches with a loud yawn before kissing Nick on the cheek and Iris on the forehead as he passes them to head to the opposite end of the room that serves as their kitchen. “You’re really gonna keep calling her that?”

“You’re the one who suggested we name our daughter after a flower,” Nick counters. He loves the name they agreed on for their daughter, but he’s still going to call her plant related nicknames because of it. If Troy can call him Nicky all he wants then he can call their daughter sprout and blossom if he wants.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” Troy grumbles jokingly. He actually finds the nickname cute. He just wishes he’d thought of it first.

“Hey, Troy, can I ask you something?” Nick asks hesitantly after a short while of relative silence.

Troy looks away from the stove long enough to glance at Nick where he sits on the couch with Iris in his arms as he feeds her a bottle of formula. “Yeah?”

“Did you ever have second thoughts about all this? Having a baby with me and us moving in together and getting mated a few days after she was born?” There’s something in Nick’s voice that makes Troy remove their food from the stove so it doesn’t burn before coming to kneel on the floor in front of Nick and Iris. Something he always does when he wants to have a serious moment with Nick.

“I’ve never been the type to think twice, Nicky. I want you and Iris more than anything. And I love you both more than I ever knew I could love anyone. Don’t ever doubt that, alright?”

That brings tears to Nicks' eyes and he nods quickly before cleaning out to meet Troy as he leans in to kiss him on the lips. He tries to put everything he feels into that one kiss. How much love and joy and fear for the future he has. He’s afraid of fucking this up, but he knows with Troy at his side he can do this. They can raise their daughter and keep her safe in a world taken by over by the dead.

“If we ever have another daughter we should name her Daisy,” Nick jokes when they finally pull away from each other, earning him a grin from Troy in response.

“Yeah? You think you might want another one after all?” Troy asks, all the hope in him shining through in those brilliant blue eyes.

“Well, the first one’s pretty great so far. Let’s play it by ear.” That earns him another kiss and a grin before Troy gets up again and goes back to fixing their breakfast.

When it’s ready Troy joins Nick on the couch, one big plate in his lap as he wraps an arm around Nick and pulls him in close to his side while he alternates between feeding himself and Nick while Nick lets Iris finish her bottle.

They stay like that well after everyone is finished eating. Iris sound asleep on Nick’s chest while Nick leans into Troy and they speak softly of the things they want for her future. A lot of it is probably things that won’t ever happen. But that’s okay. She has them and an entire community that will love and protect her no matter what. That’s all she really needs for now. And if she ever wants more they’ll do everything in their power to provide it for her. 

She’s their little miracle. She brought them together. Brought to light the corruption Nick’s mother brought to the community. And she was the inspiration for the ranch to begin expanding. They’ll have a real clinic and school some day. Plans in motion and walls almost finished. She’ll have a real home to grow up in. Not just a dusty farm with a few dozen campers and tents. A real community with people who started as enemies and became more.

It’s a future to look forward to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic is dedicated to my friends in the trick discord group. Thanks for encouraging me <3


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